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Ladies and gentlemen, welcome.

2
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Welcome to the opening ceremony of

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00:00:41,810 --> 00:00:45,350
the Ellis Bell satanic experience.

4
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Now, 120 years ago to this very day,

5
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a young man named Ellis Bell

6
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walked out of that house, along that footpath,
and into that summer house.

7
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There, he wrote a book
that would put our

8
00:01:04,090 --> 00:01:07,409
much loved village of Upper
Wharton on the map.

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The book was called The
House of Satan.

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Now, as we all know, a major movie.

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The part of Ellis Bell will be

12
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♪

13
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movie and another of Upper Warden's

14
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most famous sons, Larry Smith.

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♪

16
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Larry, Larry, it's five
grand in cash for

17
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walking down a path and
into a summer house.

18
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I ain't wearing no bleeding rug.

19
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I've, uh, put a little surprise
in there for you.

20
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What?

21
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Tiny soup song of your favorite
Peruvian marching powder?

22
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So march your bleeding plates
down that bleeding path.

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Know what I mean, son?

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♪

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♪

26
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♪

27
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Stop, Troy, stop.

28
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We go down the hill, Troy.

29
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I thought we were going
to Upper Warden.

30
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Yeah, we are. Upper Warden
is down the hill.

31
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Lower Warden is up the hill.

32
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That doesn't make any sense.

33
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Troy, this is Midsomer.

34
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Sorry, I forgot.

35
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♪

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♪

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♪

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♪

39
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♪

40
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A bomb?

41
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Semtex, something of the sort.

42
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I'm told you can buy it at car boot
sales if you know where to look.

43
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Triggered by what?

44
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Past experience, I'd say some sort
of remote control device.

45
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Where's our body?

46
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In a bag.

47
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It was a big explosion, so he
was somewhat dispersed.

48
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Troy says I should recognize the name.

49
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Larry Smith.

50
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Nah, Larry Smith.

51
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Why are you putting on
that absurd voice?

52
00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:37,410
Well, that's the way he used to talk.

53
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He made his name in a TV series about

54
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lovable East End gangsters
called Diamond Geezers.

55
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He was famous?

56
00:05:45,210 --> 00:05:46,350
Never out the tabloids.

57
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Usual stuff, birds and
booze, you know.

58
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So what's a famous Diamond Geezer doing
in a stately home like this, then?

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Apparently, he was the vicar's son.

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♪

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♪

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♪

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♪

64
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Here comes the bogeyman.

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Mike, what's the story?

66
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Ah.

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So, what do we tell him?

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We maintain the family tradition.

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We tell him the truth.

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That isn't at all what I said.

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Detective Chief Inspector Barnaby.

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Ah, Robert Smythe-Webster,
how do you do?

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Please, sir.

74
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Accept my deepest sympathy.

75
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Oh, noted and appreciated, Inspector.

76
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We kept you a seat.

77
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Thank you.

78
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So,

79
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let me tell you who everybody is.

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My younger brother, Simon,
his wife, Laura.

81
00:07:39,160 --> 00:07:44,120
Oh, and over there is my youngest brother,
who will join us when it suits him.

82
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Yes, yes.

83
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Me, darling.

84
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Forgive me, Inspector, this
is my third wife, Wendy.

85
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Fourth.

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and Larry Smith was your son.

87
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-Yes.
-He was my son.

88
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We brought him up as Lawrence
Smythe Webster.

89
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Larry Smith was a creature he
invented after he left.

90
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That is not entirely fair.

91
00:08:10,220 --> 00:08:15,579
Ah, this is my youngest brother, Francis,
Inspector, who answers to Frank.

92
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We were telling Inspector Barnaby
all about our nephew.

93
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He had lovely eyelashes.

94
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Um, do you all live in,
um, Upper Warden?

95
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You're looking at a 1-year-old
family tradition, Barnaby.

96
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The firstborn son stays at home.

97
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We live in the East Wing.

98
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The next son goes into the church and
becomes the vicar of Upper Warden.

99
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And the youngest goes
off to the Crusades.

100
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But I decided to join the godless infidels
and became a movie producer.

101
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Oh, you produced the, uh,
The House of Satan?

102
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It's the highest-grossing UK finance
movie of the last decade.

103
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Gross is an appropriate word.

104
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Well, we need a large room where we can,
uh, set up a temporary headquarters.

105
00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:14,279
Oh, absolutely.

106
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No problem.

107
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Simon will lend you the
church school room.

108
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We need the schoolroom for the Sunday school
anniversary concert rehearsals.

109
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It's God's will, Simon.

110
00:09:26,169 --> 00:09:27,549
-No, it isn't.
-It's your will.

111
00:09:28,590 --> 00:09:30,070
Now, for Warden, it's
all the same thing.

112
00:09:51,350 --> 00:09:52,350
Hi Danny.

113
00:09:53,230 --> 00:09:54,230
Hiya Phil.

114
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Coffee?

115
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You bet.

116
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What are you doing here?

117
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Catching another summer out?

118
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I made a start.

119
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And then I had to check her
ladyship's jacuzzi.

120
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Oh, you're not the first.

121
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Here's to poor Larry.

122
00:10:24,710 --> 00:10:25,710
Yeah.

123
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Poor Larry.

124
00:10:32,149 --> 00:10:36,949
So, have you, er, got any more coffee?

125
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Go on.

126
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See you down at the club later.

127
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Yeah, later.

128
00:10:51,350 --> 00:10:53,570
Apparently, it's all a pack of lies.

129
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Who says?

130
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The man I was standing next to
in the line of peasants.

131
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Local chap dressed as the
village blacksmith.

132
00:11:04,200 --> 00:11:08,520
He said Ellis Bell never went
near the summer house.

133
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He wrote the book in the neighboring
village of Lower Warden.

134
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My chap claimed the film was a

135
00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:19,680
travesty, and it was all Oliver
Cromwell's fault.

136
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Do you know this fellow again?

137
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I doubt it.

138
00:11:22,580 --> 00:11:23,879
He was covered in whiskers.

139
00:11:24,140 --> 00:11:25,220
He was local, was he?

140
00:11:25,220 --> 00:11:27,000
He wasn't one of the
Causton Amdram lot.

141
00:11:27,320 --> 00:11:28,320
Definitely local.

142
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We were only there to
make up the numbers.

143
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Day in the fresh air, buffet lunch.

144
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Rather a good lunch, as
a matter of fact.

145
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Danny the chef's speciality,
meatballs.

146
00:11:39,820 --> 00:11:40,820
Sweet boy.

147
00:11:42,340 --> 00:11:46,460
Apparently, he just lost his mother, but
he still insisted on turning up.

148
00:11:56,200 --> 00:11:57,400
All on your own, sir?

149
00:11:57,960 --> 00:11:58,960
Yes, Danny.

150
00:12:00,420 --> 00:12:01,700
The family's deserted me.

151
00:12:06,049 --> 00:12:09,449
We're all very sorry about what
happened this afternoon, sir.

152
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Thank you, Danny.

153
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Very kind.

154
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And I do appreciate the fact that
you turned up at all today.

155
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Because of my mum.

156
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So soon after the funeral.

157
00:12:22,549 --> 00:12:24,629
She brought Larry into
the world, you know.

158
00:12:25,629 --> 00:12:26,769
Did the same for me, I suppose.

159
00:12:29,570 --> 00:12:34,649
I wonder if you realize the full tragic
irony of today's whole sorry business.

160
00:12:36,350 --> 00:12:38,029
Well, getting blown up's
got to be a bit tragic.

161
00:12:39,850 --> 00:12:44,789
The irony is that from the point of view
of the film and of this place,

162
00:12:47,350 --> 00:12:50,370
Larry's death would be terribly
good for business.

163
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:56,000
♪

164
00:12:56,250 --> 00:12:58,500
♪

165
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:04,500
♪

166
00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:17,500
♪

167
00:13:17,750 --> 00:13:22,000
♪

168
00:13:23,549 --> 00:13:25,870
Morning. Morning. Morning.

169
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I'd like to talk to Mr.
Frank Smythe-Webster.

170
00:13:34,019 --> 00:13:35,579
He calls himself Frank Webster.

171
00:13:36,339 --> 00:13:38,199
Well, I want to talk to him
under either of his names.

172
00:13:38,479 --> 00:13:39,959
He's working out in the
Ellisville Motagen.

173
00:13:41,699 --> 00:13:42,699
Don't blame me.

174
00:13:43,259 --> 00:13:44,719
It's a marketing concept.

175
00:13:45,339 --> 00:13:46,339
Thank you, Helen.

176
00:13:50,169 --> 00:13:51,490
Mike, don't panic.

177
00:13:51,949 --> 00:13:52,949
No, no, no, no.

178
00:13:52,949 --> 00:13:54,449
My friend, there is no problem.

179
00:13:54,909 --> 00:13:58,470
I mean, wasn't it Gertrude Stein who said
a geyser is a geyser is a geyser?

180
00:13:59,990 --> 00:14:00,990
Yes, well...

181
00:14:00,990 --> 00:14:02,110
I'll call you back.

182
00:14:08,540 --> 00:14:10,540
Inspector Barnaby, how can I help you?

183
00:14:11,440 --> 00:14:12,500
My first choice.

184
00:14:14,340 --> 00:14:17,000
Who stood to gain by killing
your nephew?

185
00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:20,860
Well, certainly not me.

186
00:14:21,620 --> 00:14:24,540
You realize we start shooting
House of Satan 2 next month?

187
00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:26,280
No, no, I didn't realize that.

188
00:14:27,660 --> 00:14:29,620
You're having to find
another actor, eh?

189
00:14:29,720 --> 00:14:30,720
Yes.

190
00:14:31,080 --> 00:14:35,259
And once agents realize the fine mess we're
in, the price goes to the roof.

191
00:14:36,540 --> 00:14:37,940
I find that deeply offensive.

192
00:14:39,060 --> 00:14:40,360
Is that all it's about, then?

193
00:14:40,900 --> 00:14:41,900
Money.

194
00:14:41,900 --> 00:14:42,900
The bottom line.

195
00:14:43,100 --> 00:14:44,100
Everything's about money.

196
00:14:45,220 --> 00:14:46,620
What did you expect?

197
00:14:46,620 --> 00:14:51,220
Well, I probably expected a little
more grief from the bereaved.

198
00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:56,180
With the possible exception of
his mother, you could put

199
00:14:56,180 --> 00:14:59,200
it down to the stiff upper lip
of the English ruling class.

200
00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:01,900
But more likely, it's the fact
that nobody liked him.

201
00:15:03,560 --> 00:15:05,060
Mr. Webster, call me Frank.

202
00:15:07,820 --> 00:15:11,879
Frank, I've been bullied by the media
into holding a press conference.

203
00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:14,680
Would you mind taking part, please?

204
00:15:15,400 --> 00:15:16,480
My pleasure.

205
00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:18,600
All publicity is good publicity.

206
00:15:22,529 --> 00:15:23,849
Yes, yes,

207
00:15:26,009 --> 00:15:27,429
yes, I'll come back to you.

208
00:15:30,460 --> 00:15:35,139
Larry Smith was not only my nephew
but a sweet guy and a

209
00:15:35,960 --> 00:15:40,659
very dear friend destined, I
believe, to become a major

210
00:15:40,659 --> 00:15:45,460
international star in our next project
together, House of Satan 2.

211
00:15:49,700 --> 00:15:54,560
We have no idea who has perpetrated
this ghastly crime, but we will

212
00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:57,840
give the police every assistance in
bringing the killer to justice.

213
00:15:59,660 --> 00:16:00,660
Thank you.

214
00:16:01,100 --> 00:16:02,300
Thank you, Mr. Webster.

215
00:16:03,300 --> 00:16:05,680
All right, I'll take questions
now, please.

216
00:16:06,120 --> 00:16:07,120
Yes?

217
00:16:07,480 --> 00:16:09,040
Murdoch, Causton Echo.

218
00:16:09,820 --> 00:16:10,820
Yes.

219
00:16:11,180 --> 00:16:13,200
Knowing of Larry Smith's history of

220
00:16:13,200 --> 00:16:16,520
substance abuse, could his
murder be drugs related?

221
00:16:17,180 --> 00:16:20,900
At present, nothing is ruled out.

222
00:16:23,910 --> 00:16:26,710
Jack Wilson, Upper Warden
Church Newsletter.

223
00:16:27,310 --> 00:16:29,570
I also keep the bookshop
in the high street.

224
00:16:30,150 --> 00:16:34,690
With respect, our friend should go back
home to his own kind in Causton.

225
00:16:35,210 --> 00:16:37,129
This is purely and simply
a local initiative.

226
00:16:38,330 --> 00:16:39,509
Well, thank you, Mr. Wilson.

227
00:16:40,030 --> 00:16:41,030
What's your question?

228
00:16:41,230 --> 00:16:42,230
No question.

229
00:16:42,230 --> 00:16:43,830
I'm simply putting the
record straight.

230
00:16:44,350 --> 00:16:47,190
We're talking about Upper
Warden and Lower Warden.

231
00:16:48,210 --> 00:16:50,970
We've been murdering each other here
since the time of Cromwell.

232
00:16:51,050 --> 00:16:52,270
We're not going to change now.

233
00:16:53,190 --> 00:16:55,650
March the 14th, 1643.

234
00:16:55,830 --> 00:16:56,870
That's when it all began.

235
00:16:56,970 --> 00:17:00,070
Mr. Wilson, would you
excuse me, please?

236
00:17:00,170 --> 00:17:01,690
My sergeant needs to speak to me.

237
00:17:08,559 --> 00:17:09,559
What's the crisis?

238
00:17:09,620 --> 00:17:10,620
Fight broke out.

239
00:17:10,900 --> 00:17:12,080
-Really?
-Who's been fighting?

240
00:17:12,340 --> 00:17:13,340
Over there.

241
00:17:23,849 --> 00:17:24,849
What happened?

242
00:17:26,169 --> 00:17:27,990
I come here with my flowers for Larry,

243
00:17:28,109 --> 00:17:30,029
and there she was with her
flowers for Larry.

244
00:17:30,329 --> 00:17:32,689
Well, I think he would have been glad
to have flowers from you both.

245
00:17:33,369 --> 00:17:34,369
When did you meet him?

246
00:17:34,750 --> 00:17:37,289
Last year, when he was here filming
The House of Satan.

247
00:17:37,469 --> 00:17:39,189
Which is when our relationship
started.

248
00:17:39,849 --> 00:17:41,209
She called it a relationship.

249
00:17:41,789 --> 00:17:44,750
So I called her a lying cow, and
she hit me with her flowers.

250
00:17:45,709 --> 00:17:47,250
How come it's all blood with flowers?

251
00:17:48,049 --> 00:17:51,089
It was an arrangement in a pot.

252
00:17:51,669 --> 00:17:54,469
I always think a nice arrangement is more
appropriate on these occasions.

253
00:17:55,169 --> 00:17:57,669
I think it will be more
appropriate if you

254
00:17:57,669 --> 00:18:01,069
were both to go home and grow
up in either order.

255
00:18:01,889 --> 00:18:02,889
Go.

256
00:18:17,750 --> 00:18:20,369
He seems to have put it about a bit
when he was here last year.

257
00:18:21,009 --> 00:18:24,750
Jane, Caroline, Michelle, Fiona.

258
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:30,440
There's one here from Darren.

259
00:18:32,960 --> 00:18:33,960
Darren?

260
00:18:34,140 --> 00:18:36,119
Any idea who Darren might be?

261
00:18:36,779 --> 00:18:38,559
Apparently, he's the local video nerd.

262
00:18:39,259 --> 00:18:42,460
He was covering the event, and a bit of
an obsessive, so worth checking out.

263
00:18:43,039 --> 00:18:44,900
He sometimes helps at
the local bookshop.

264
00:19:01,799 --> 00:19:02,799
Hello?

265
00:19:32,700 --> 00:19:34,120
I'm looking for Mr. Wilson.

266
00:19:36,480 --> 00:19:37,480
He's not here.

267
00:19:38,559 --> 00:19:39,559
You must be Darren.

268
00:19:41,120 --> 00:19:42,120
That's very good.

269
00:19:43,420 --> 00:19:44,420
Lucky guess.

270
00:19:46,100 --> 00:19:47,620
Mr. Wilson's out delivering these.

271
00:19:48,220 --> 00:19:49,220
These?

272
00:19:49,539 --> 00:19:51,100
Well, he's not delivering these.

273
00:19:51,160 --> 00:19:53,819
He's delivering the ones we've already
done, if you see what I mean.

274
00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:56,000
I see what you mean.

275
00:19:56,420 --> 00:19:57,420
May I?

276
00:19:57,420 --> 00:19:58,420
Oh, yes, it's free.

277
00:19:59,140 --> 00:20:01,620
Mr. Wilson's brought out a special
edition because of the murder.

278
00:20:02,120 --> 00:20:05,160
And he's written an editorial about
how the police haven't a clue.

279
00:20:13,400 --> 00:20:14,400
I see.

280
00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:17,480
Shall I make us a cup of tea?

281
00:20:18,180 --> 00:20:19,180
Yeah.

282
00:20:19,620 --> 00:20:21,960
Then you can tell me what the clue
is that the police don't have.

283
00:20:36,869 --> 00:20:38,110
There you are, Barnaby.

284
00:20:38,390 --> 00:20:41,410
That's your basic satanic experience.

285
00:20:41,990 --> 00:20:44,430
What, a darkened room with
some strange noises?

286
00:20:45,130 --> 00:20:48,610
It's an homage, a key
scene in the movie.

287
00:20:49,110 --> 00:20:51,830
Our hero is locked in a darkened
room by the bad

288
00:20:51,830 --> 00:20:56,850
guys and driven mad by a series
of unexplained noises.

289
00:21:05,799 --> 00:21:10,359
Then, of course, he recovers his sanity
in order to kill off the bad guys.

290
00:21:11,159 --> 00:21:12,159
An homage?

291
00:21:12,659 --> 00:21:16,680
According to our market research,
movie buffs love an homage.

292
00:21:17,579 --> 00:21:22,379
Show them a plastic shark with
a shower curtain from Psycho,

293
00:21:22,399 --> 00:21:25,159
and they wet themselves with glee
and reach for their wallets.

294
00:21:25,619 --> 00:21:26,680
Where exactly are we?

295
00:21:27,960 --> 00:21:29,519
Immediately below the gymnasium.

296
00:21:30,079 --> 00:21:31,079
Well spotted.

297
00:21:34,849 --> 00:21:38,730
What about this state of
war with Lowell Warden?

298
00:21:39,230 --> 00:21:40,469
Mr Wilson knows about that.

299
00:21:41,049 --> 00:21:42,329
And Oliver Cromwell?

300
00:21:43,049 --> 00:21:44,509
Mr Wilson knows about that too.

301
00:21:47,599 --> 00:21:49,619
Do you know about anything, Darren?

302
00:21:51,199 --> 00:21:55,639
I know a lot about classic movies
and The Prisoner and Doctor Who.

303
00:21:56,919 --> 00:21:59,439
You left some flowers
at the murder scene.

304
00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:01,119
Well, yes.

305
00:22:02,259 --> 00:22:04,279
Did you have a relationship
with Larry Smith?

306
00:22:05,959 --> 00:22:06,959
No.

307
00:22:07,399 --> 00:22:09,319
I don't have relationships, as a rule.

308
00:22:10,559 --> 00:22:12,659
But I've got all 26 episodes
of Diamond

309
00:22:12,659 --> 00:22:15,759
Geezers on video and House of
Satan on video and DVD.

310
00:22:22,549 --> 00:22:24,750
Tell me how you met Larry Smith.

311
00:22:25,890 --> 00:22:27,830
It was last year when they
were making the film.

312
00:22:28,290 --> 00:22:30,910
I was chambermaiding at the big house, he
was staying there with the film unit.

313
00:22:31,610 --> 00:22:32,769
And you fell in love?

314
00:22:32,990 --> 00:22:34,950
Oh well, that would be
pushing it a bit.

315
00:22:35,710 --> 00:22:37,509
But you had a relationship?

316
00:22:37,990 --> 00:22:39,810
Oh yeah, definitely a relationship.

317
00:22:42,310 --> 00:22:43,590
How long did it last?

318
00:22:46,299 --> 00:22:48,039
Couple of hours, maybe.

319
00:22:52,150 --> 00:22:55,289
Emily, my love, the memory
can do funny things.

320
00:22:56,950 --> 00:22:59,849
Now, it's the only way I
can persuade you that

321
00:22:59,849 --> 00:23:01,829
it might have lasted a little
longer than that.

322
00:23:04,450 --> 00:23:05,450
Yeah.

323
00:23:07,729 --> 00:23:11,889
Tell me about your night of
passion with Larry Smith.

324
00:23:14,950 --> 00:23:17,150
It was a Thursday afternoon.

325
00:23:19,230 --> 00:23:21,410
Emily, what did I just say?

326
00:23:30,049 --> 00:23:33,909
I shall never forget the first
time he looked into my eyes.

327
00:23:36,049 --> 00:23:37,750
Would you like to be famous, Darren?

328
00:23:38,409 --> 00:23:40,009
I'd love to, but I can't
see it happening.

329
00:23:40,089 --> 00:23:41,089
Can you?

330
00:23:41,210 --> 00:23:42,210
Let's hope not.

331
00:23:44,329 --> 00:23:47,049
If you'd murdered Larry Smith,
you'd be famous.

332
00:23:48,450 --> 00:23:49,909
But only for 15 minutes.

333
00:23:50,210 --> 00:23:51,210
Is it worth it?

334
00:23:53,150 --> 00:23:55,810
I believe you made a video
of yesterday's events.

335
00:23:56,310 --> 00:23:58,430
Yes, I make videos of everything
that happens in the village.

336
00:23:58,650 --> 00:23:59,650
Would you like it as evidence?

337
00:23:59,850 --> 00:24:00,850
Please.

338
00:24:00,850 --> 00:24:02,990
Right, remind me to bring it from
home next time I see you.

339
00:24:03,930 --> 00:24:05,630
I'm reminding you now, Darren.

340
00:24:07,790 --> 00:24:10,590
And you can sell me a copy of The
House of Satan before I leave.

341
00:24:11,670 --> 00:24:12,670
Right.

342
00:24:15,410 --> 00:24:16,410
Which one do you want?

343
00:24:17,130 --> 00:24:18,130
Is there more than one?

344
00:24:21,220 --> 00:24:22,220
There's two.

345
00:24:22,519 --> 00:24:25,740
There's the book of the film and there's
Ellis Bell's original version.

346
00:24:26,379 --> 00:24:27,379
Are they different?

347
00:24:27,440 --> 00:24:30,259
Yes. The book of the film's got
the haunted dungeon in it.

348
00:24:30,659 --> 00:24:31,659
Oh.

349
00:24:31,879 --> 00:24:33,059
I better have one of each then.

350
00:24:33,819 --> 00:24:35,819
I'm sorry, we only stock
the book of the film.

351
00:24:36,220 --> 00:24:37,759
You'll have to go lower warden
for the other one.

352
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:43,599
Could Darren organize an explosion?

353
00:24:43,980 --> 00:24:46,559
I bet you can learn how to do it from
the net if you know where to surf.

354
00:24:47,460 --> 00:24:48,839
I've seen him again this evening.

355
00:24:49,740 --> 00:24:50,859
I'll ask him about it then.

356
00:24:51,359 --> 00:24:52,500
-Why?
-Why have you seen him again?

357
00:24:53,420 --> 00:24:57,019
Oh, he's promised to do some research
on jealous husbands and

358
00:24:57,019 --> 00:24:59,980
jealous boyfriends, and he's bringing
his video in from home.

359
00:25:00,099 --> 00:25:01,099
Excellent.

360
00:25:01,740 --> 00:25:04,500
In the words of Alfred Hitchcock,
act as a cattle.

361
00:25:05,660 --> 00:25:07,700
Yeah, yeah, that's a bit rough
on cattle, I know.

362
00:25:08,359 --> 00:25:09,740
So give the guy an evasive answer.

363
00:25:09,740 --> 00:25:11,460
Tell him to go screw himself.

364
00:25:13,950 --> 00:25:15,809
Film producers do that
for fun, do they?

365
00:25:16,110 --> 00:25:17,210
No, because it's good for them.

366
00:25:17,269 --> 00:25:18,890
Oh, I hate things that
are good for me.

367
00:25:19,490 --> 00:25:20,569
So, what have we got?

368
00:25:26,049 --> 00:25:27,649
I'll do this my way.

369
00:25:28,069 --> 00:25:29,069
Father's way.

370
00:25:29,089 --> 00:25:30,230
Short, sharp, shock.

371
00:25:31,490 --> 00:25:33,129
Look, we talked about it.

372
00:25:33,169 --> 00:25:34,250
We agreed, remember?

373
00:25:35,889 --> 00:25:39,230
Hey, you remember how we used to settle
arguments when we were kids?

374
00:25:40,129 --> 00:25:41,129
What?

375
00:25:41,230 --> 00:25:44,210
You can't settle a thing like
this with a toss of a coin.

376
00:25:44,369 --> 00:25:45,369
Want a bet?

377
00:25:45,930 --> 00:25:46,930
Heads.

378
00:25:58,849 --> 00:25:59,849
My way.

379
00:26:03,500 --> 00:26:09,000
♪

380
00:26:12,150 --> 00:26:13,870
This suit's going to be ruined.

381
00:26:14,050 --> 00:26:15,150
Well, it's your fault.

382
00:26:15,530 --> 00:26:16,910
You won the toss, remember?

383
00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:24,000
♪

384
00:26:24,250 --> 00:26:27,000
♪

385
00:26:32,099 --> 00:26:34,119
Well, we've done as we were told.

386
00:26:34,240 --> 00:26:38,339
We've left the package on the tree stump
and stayed well out of the way.

387
00:26:40,889 --> 00:26:42,470
Let's see how good they are.

388
00:26:42,690 --> 00:26:44,309
I keep telling you, bro.

389
00:26:44,610 --> 00:26:46,450
It's amateur night in Dixie.

390
00:26:56,500 --> 00:27:01,500
♪

391
00:27:12,099 --> 00:27:15,319
Now what happens we watch this space

392
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:35,000
♪

393
00:27:35,250 --> 00:27:40,000
♪

394
00:27:42,700 --> 00:27:43,740
Morning, Helen.

395
00:27:44,279 --> 00:27:45,400
Morning, Mr. Webster.

396
00:27:45,920 --> 00:27:46,920
You're up early.

397
00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:51,680
Yes, a quick workout, healthy breakfast,
then back to the big

398
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:54,680
city to find a cheap and willing
actor who wants to be a star.

399
00:27:54,819 --> 00:27:56,539
He'll have to be brave
as well, won't he?

400
00:27:56,860 --> 00:27:57,860
Stupid will do.

401
00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:00,019
Did you know this, Troy?

402
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:03,100
If a leading actor drops
dead just as he's about

403
00:28:03,100 --> 00:28:05,220
to make a film, apparently
there's always an

404
00:28:05,220 --> 00:28:08,600
insurance deal, sometimes amounting
to millions of pounds.

405
00:28:09,220 --> 00:28:11,400
A lot of people are making
money from the situation.

406
00:28:12,059 --> 00:28:15,720
My 24 Hours of Passion by broken-hearted
Emily Gaskell.

407
00:28:16,940 --> 00:28:18,700
Somebody's feeding the tabloids.

408
00:28:19,539 --> 00:28:21,220
Bet it's that journalist
from the Costa maker.

409
00:28:27,700 --> 00:28:29,620
Was that there last night
when you left?

410
00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:32,240
No, definitely not.

411
00:28:33,279 --> 00:28:34,279
Lev.

412
00:28:36,349 --> 00:28:39,509
Wasn't he a Russian goalie,
Lev Yashin?

413
00:28:39,990 --> 00:28:44,029
It's a biblical reference, Leviticus,
from the Bible.

414
00:28:45,089 --> 00:28:47,449
Every schoolboy's favorite dirty book.

415
00:28:49,349 --> 00:28:51,209
I'm going to talk to
the Reverend Simon.

416
00:29:05,199 --> 00:29:06,919
Mr. Barnaby, good morning.

417
00:29:07,259 --> 00:29:08,259
Morning, sir.

418
00:29:09,059 --> 00:29:11,700
I'm very sorry to disturb
you, but I was

419
00:29:12,059 --> 00:29:15,079
hoping for some help with
a biblical reference.

420
00:29:16,079 --> 00:29:18,700
Leviticus chapter 18, verse 16.

421
00:29:19,180 --> 00:29:20,379
Oh, you've seen it, have you?

422
00:29:21,379 --> 00:29:22,700
I assume you didn't do it.

423
00:29:23,319 --> 00:29:26,200
I have many frailties,
but I'm not vulgar.

424
00:29:27,879 --> 00:29:31,319
The chapter deals with various prohibitions
in carnal matters.

425
00:29:32,399 --> 00:29:35,659
And the people and the later of us
is indeed the animals that one

426
00:29:35,659 --> 00:29:39,720
is not permitted to have sexual relations
with according to God's law.

427
00:29:41,359 --> 00:29:44,379
Here we are, verse 16.

428
00:29:48,909 --> 00:29:52,069
Thou shalt not uncover the nakedness
of thy brother's wife.

429
00:29:53,629 --> 00:29:55,210
I think the meaning is clear.

430
00:30:00,369 --> 00:30:01,369
Please.

431
00:30:06,750 --> 00:30:10,450
Why would someone write
that on the school

432
00:30:10,450 --> 00:30:12,450
room wall, knowing the
police would see it?

433
00:30:14,089 --> 00:30:16,809
I imagine they're pointing
the finger at our family.

434
00:30:17,950 --> 00:30:18,950
Anyone in particular?

435
00:30:23,029 --> 00:30:26,170
I'll answer your questions truthfully
and honestly, Mr. Barnaby.

436
00:30:27,670 --> 00:30:30,090
But I don't deal in gossip
and innuendo.

437
00:30:30,410 --> 00:30:31,650
-Oh, I'm sure.
-I'm sure you don't.

438
00:30:35,150 --> 00:30:38,590
Can we consider, please, your eldest

439
00:30:39,069 --> 00:30:42,410
brother's wife, Mrs. Wendy
Smythe-Webster?

440
00:30:44,170 --> 00:30:47,170
Is it possible that your

441
00:30:47,170 --> 00:30:50,509
brother, Frank, or

442
00:30:51,230 --> 00:30:56,050
even your late son, for
example, might have

443
00:30:58,269 --> 00:31:03,650
uncovered her nakedness and that Brother
Rupert took exception to it?

444
00:31:08,529 --> 00:31:11,369
Wendy may not be the brightest
star in God's

445
00:31:11,369 --> 00:31:14,450
firmament, but she's fundamentally
harmless.

446
00:31:15,430 --> 00:31:19,509
A flirt and, in the verdacular,
a bimbo.

447
00:31:20,430 --> 00:31:22,710
But not, I believe, an adulteress.

448
00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:38,000
♪

449
00:32:41,990 --> 00:32:42,829
Men over

450
00:32:42,830 --> 00:32:44,190
♪

451
00:32:44,190 --> 00:32:45,190
take exercise.

452
00:32:45,549 --> 00:32:48,450
Promise me you'll never go searching
for your lost youth, Tom.

453
00:32:48,930 --> 00:32:50,650
It's lost because it's
meant to be lost.

454
00:32:51,569 --> 00:32:52,650
You sure it's heart failure?

455
00:32:53,410 --> 00:32:56,470
Well, not until I've done a
full examination, but...

456
00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:02,039
Why would a man who's
never had a proper

457
00:33:02,039 --> 00:33:05,319
job in his life have a
workman's hand, sir?

458
00:33:07,549 --> 00:33:08,970
Or could that be a Scotchman?

459
00:33:09,649 --> 00:33:10,649
Let's have a look.

460
00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:22,000
♪

461
00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:24,319
Are these things usually connected
to the main, sir?

462
00:33:25,180 --> 00:33:27,119
Yes, there's stuff full
of computerized

463
00:33:27,500 --> 00:33:29,140
instrumentation so you can
measure your progress.

464
00:33:29,980 --> 00:33:30,980
All right, we'll check that bike.

465
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:33,380
See if the circuits are blown.

466
00:33:35,059 --> 00:33:37,619
He was making an early start
back to London, he said.

467
00:33:39,180 --> 00:33:40,720
Did anyone else go into the gym?

468
00:33:41,420 --> 00:33:42,420
No.

469
00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:45,019
No, he's the only one who's
ever used it so far.

470
00:33:47,220 --> 00:33:48,460
Very healthy, he was.

471
00:33:50,059 --> 00:33:51,380
But you found the body?

472
00:33:52,460 --> 00:33:53,460
Yeah.

473
00:33:55,980 --> 00:33:57,019
See, er...

474
00:33:57,680 --> 00:34:00,619
I assumed he'd, um...

475
00:34:00,619 --> 00:34:03,980
..have his workout and then go back
to his room for breakfast.

476
00:34:04,779 --> 00:34:05,859
Cos that's what he usually did.

477
00:34:07,460 --> 00:34:09,940
But then I started getting
phone calls for

478
00:34:09,940 --> 00:34:14,440
him and there was no answer
from his room, so...

479
00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:15,480
I thought I'd better check.

480
00:34:18,630 --> 00:34:19,630
There he was.

481
00:34:26,449 --> 00:34:28,589
I've never seen anyone dead before.

482
00:34:30,809 --> 00:34:32,049
You should go home.

483
00:34:34,169 --> 00:34:35,710
Somebody's coming in to relieve me.

484
00:34:35,989 --> 00:34:36,989
Good.

485
00:34:37,969 --> 00:34:38,969
Miss Ellis Bell?

486
00:34:39,629 --> 00:34:40,629
Ellis Bell.

487
00:34:41,469 --> 00:34:42,469
The proper one.

488
00:34:43,669 --> 00:34:44,669
What a mess, eh?

489
00:34:47,349 --> 00:34:48,630
It's all your fault.

490
00:34:56,329 --> 00:34:57,329
Yes, that would do it.

491
00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:02,880
So all anyone would need
to put a mains charge

492
00:35:02,880 --> 00:35:05,440
through the exercise bike would
be a set of jump leads, yeah?

493
00:35:05,700 --> 00:35:06,700
And rubber gloves.

494
00:35:07,760 --> 00:35:08,840
That means no fingerprints.

495
00:35:10,120 --> 00:35:11,220
Well, it's obviously worth checking,

496
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:13,100
but I wouldn't build your
hopes too highly.

497
00:35:17,500 --> 00:35:22,500
♪

498
00:35:22,750 --> 00:35:27,750
♪

499
00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:33,000
♪

500
00:35:33,250 --> 00:35:38,250
♪

501
00:35:38,500 --> 00:35:43,500
♪

502
00:35:43,750 --> 00:35:44,849
♪

503
00:35:44,849 --> 00:35:46,650
And then there were four.

504
00:35:49,699 --> 00:35:51,559
I don't think that's very amusing.

505
00:35:52,679 --> 00:35:54,559
Did I say I was amused?

506
00:35:56,849 --> 00:35:58,549
Well, I think it's awful.

507
00:36:00,619 --> 00:36:02,849
Ah, Inspector Barnaby.

508
00:36:08,449 --> 00:36:10,609
Why don't you sit in your usual chair?

509
00:36:11,429 --> 00:36:12,429
Thank you very much.

510
00:36:17,599 --> 00:36:21,559
Uh, please accept my deepest sympathy.

511
00:36:22,819 --> 00:36:25,559
Noted, appreciated, as ever.

512
00:36:27,279 --> 00:36:28,859
Well, I have to ask the
obvious question.

513
00:36:30,279 --> 00:36:32,539
Did your brother Frank
have any enemies?

514
00:36:38,569 --> 00:36:39,569
Apparently.

515
00:36:39,789 --> 00:36:41,049
Otherwise he'd still be alive.

516
00:36:47,970 --> 00:36:48,970
He was nice.

517
00:36:49,870 --> 00:36:51,410
Everybody liked him.

518
00:36:53,230 --> 00:36:55,630
Is that the general view
around the table?

519
00:36:58,210 --> 00:36:59,830
He had great charm.

520
00:37:00,750 --> 00:37:01,850
Indeed, he had.

521
00:37:05,710 --> 00:37:07,029
Who's in charge of security?

522
00:37:07,569 --> 00:37:08,569
Oh, there isn't any.

523
00:37:09,610 --> 00:37:12,469
We lock the door, but the
residents have keys.

524
00:37:12,589 --> 00:37:13,769
The staff have keys.

525
00:37:13,989 --> 00:37:14,989
We all have keys.

526
00:37:15,909 --> 00:37:18,849
I imagine all the weasels in the
Wildwood have their own keys.

527
00:37:19,469 --> 00:37:22,230
They probably keep duplicates in
their little potting sheds.

528
00:37:23,529 --> 00:37:26,529
Weasels in the Wildwood, as
in wind in the willows?

529
00:37:27,110 --> 00:37:30,210
It's my brother's way of
referring to the people

530
00:37:30,210 --> 00:37:33,429
of Loa Warden, who'd like
nothing more than to

531
00:37:33,429 --> 00:37:35,589
overrun this place the way the
weasels do in the book.

532
00:37:36,369 --> 00:37:38,789
Don't think the weasels murdered
the inhabitants?

533
00:37:39,529 --> 00:37:40,529
Quite correct.

534
00:37:41,329 --> 00:37:45,009
As I recall it, Mr. Toad
marshals his forces,

535
00:37:45,469 --> 00:37:48,029
and they all mount a very successful
counter-attack.

536
00:37:48,449 --> 00:37:51,670
To be precise, they whack them and
whack them and whack them.

537
00:38:00,949 --> 00:38:05,589
Look, two members of your family have
now been murdered in as many days.

538
00:38:06,190 --> 00:38:10,049
And when I talk to you or to anyone
from Upper Warden about

539
00:38:10,049 --> 00:38:13,949
possible motives, you all point me
in the direction of Lower Warden.

540
00:38:14,130 --> 00:38:15,130
Oh, of course.

541
00:38:15,309 --> 00:38:17,210
It's in the natural order of things.

542
00:38:24,550 --> 00:38:27,510
I'm sure you'll forgive me, Mrs. Wendy

543
00:38:27,889 --> 00:38:31,590
Smythe-Webster, but it's a
time for plain speaking.

544
00:38:32,769 --> 00:38:35,870
I've heard it suggested that you had a

545
00:38:35,870 --> 00:38:39,630
sexual relationship with
your late nephew,

546
00:38:41,789 --> 00:38:47,030
which on the face of it would provide your
husband with a motive to murder him.

547
00:38:48,730 --> 00:38:52,450
And the graffiti that appeared
on the schoolroom wall last

548
00:38:52,450 --> 00:38:56,990
night would suggest that one or other
of you three brothers had

549
00:38:56,990 --> 00:39:01,550
an extramarital relationship with one
or the other of your two wives,

550
00:39:03,570 --> 00:39:07,510
which, if it were frank,
would give the

551
00:39:07,510 --> 00:39:11,210
aggrieved brother a motive
for his murder.

552
00:39:12,000 --> 00:39:15,500
♪

553
00:39:20,619 --> 00:39:23,619
We're a family with secrets, Inspector,
like any other family.

554
00:39:25,159 --> 00:39:27,000
But if those secrets
drove any of us to

555
00:39:27,000 --> 00:39:29,900
murder, we would do it
the gentleman's way.

556
00:39:30,239 --> 00:39:31,420
With a bullet through the brain.

557
00:39:32,440 --> 00:39:33,940
And face to face.

558
00:39:35,239 --> 00:39:38,019
And remember, the main purpose of this

559
00:39:38,019 --> 00:39:43,239
family, perhaps our only
purpose, is survival.

560
00:39:47,000 --> 00:39:52,000
♪

561
00:39:58,550 --> 00:40:01,530
It says The Shining, cos that's
what I'd like it to be.

562
00:40:02,230 --> 00:40:05,230
It's my only copy, so we'll take
good care of it, Darren.

563
00:40:07,410 --> 00:40:09,170
Now, you were going to
go through this list

564
00:40:09,170 --> 00:40:11,690
of people who left flowers
for Larry Smith.

565
00:40:13,930 --> 00:40:14,930
Was I?

566
00:40:15,810 --> 00:40:16,810
You were, Darren.

567
00:40:18,230 --> 00:40:20,390
And I even bought you a pint
to assist your memory.

568
00:40:21,130 --> 00:40:22,130
Oh.

569
00:40:22,250 --> 00:40:23,250
All right, then.

570
00:40:23,250 --> 00:40:24,250
Cheers.

571
00:40:30,119 --> 00:40:31,860
This must be Emily Gaskell.

572
00:40:32,400 --> 00:40:33,559
She's from Lower Warden.

573
00:40:33,960 --> 00:40:34,960
Yes, you've met Emily.

574
00:40:35,579 --> 00:40:39,179
But what's a girl from Lower Warden doing
leaving flowers for a smith-webster?

575
00:40:40,039 --> 00:40:42,360
Emily is engaged to Phil Harrison.

576
00:40:42,980 --> 00:40:44,139
He's from Lower Warden.

577
00:40:44,440 --> 00:40:45,440
He fixes windmills.

578
00:40:45,760 --> 00:40:46,760
He even lives in one.

579
00:40:47,300 --> 00:40:48,300
Windmills?

580
00:40:48,579 --> 00:40:52,039
Yeah, well, he fixes anything, really,
but mills is what he prefers.

581
00:40:52,500 --> 00:40:56,179
Windmills, watermills,
satanic mills, maybe.

582
00:40:58,500 --> 00:40:59,500
That's a joke.

583
00:41:02,200 --> 00:41:03,200
Next.

584
00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:05,160
Here's a straight one.

585
00:41:05,580 --> 00:41:06,580
Wendy.

586
00:41:06,940 --> 00:41:07,940
Ah, the lady of the house.

587
00:41:08,700 --> 00:41:10,240
And, er, is she a lady?

588
00:41:12,019 --> 00:41:14,539
From what people say, not entirely.

589
00:41:15,200 --> 00:41:16,620
But that's people, not me.

590
00:41:16,760 --> 00:41:18,220
I try not to have opinions.

591
00:41:22,559 --> 00:41:23,559
Darren.

592
00:41:23,759 --> 00:41:25,079
Oh, that's me, isn't it?

593
00:41:25,319 --> 00:41:26,319
You know about me.

594
00:41:27,199 --> 00:41:28,199
Oh, quite.

595
00:41:29,039 --> 00:41:31,679
Are you an Upper Warden man
or a Lower Warden man?

596
00:41:32,679 --> 00:41:35,980
Well, I work mostly in Upper
Warden, but I live

597
00:41:35,980 --> 00:41:38,679
mostly with my gran on the
edge of Lower Warden.

598
00:41:39,259 --> 00:41:41,159
But you're in the Upper Warden TA?

599
00:41:46,460 --> 00:41:47,960
Well, thank you, then.

600
00:41:50,480 --> 00:41:51,480
Isn't there one more thing?

601
00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:54,139
Columbo always has one more
thing, doesn't he?

602
00:41:55,239 --> 00:41:56,239
If you insist.

603
00:41:57,420 --> 00:41:58,420
One more thing.

604
00:41:59,880 --> 00:42:03,219
In the T.A., do you handle explosives?

605
00:42:15,500 --> 00:42:20,500
♪

606
00:42:20,750 --> 00:42:25,000
♪

607
00:42:38,849 --> 00:42:39,849
Phil Harrison.

608
00:42:42,150 --> 00:42:43,230
Who wants to know?

609
00:42:43,910 --> 00:42:46,070
Sergeant Troy, Causton CID.

610
00:42:48,369 --> 00:42:49,670
Yeah, I'm Phil Harrison.
What's your problem?

611
00:42:50,030 --> 00:42:51,030
I thought it might be your problem.

612
00:42:52,490 --> 00:42:55,789
Larry, My Lost Love by Broken
Hearted Emily Gaskell.

613
00:42:56,809 --> 00:42:57,809
Isn't she your girlfriend?

614
00:42:58,730 --> 00:42:59,730
So?

615
00:43:00,430 --> 00:43:02,349
Are you saying nothing happened
between her and Larry?

616
00:43:02,849 --> 00:43:03,970
Nothing that bothered me.

617
00:43:05,170 --> 00:43:07,990
If I'd have been bothered, I'd
have taken little Larry

618
00:43:07,990 --> 00:43:11,710
down some pretty country lane
and punched his lights out.

619
00:43:12,210 --> 00:43:13,210
The squatties way.

620
00:43:15,550 --> 00:43:16,730
The squaddies way?

621
00:43:17,090 --> 00:43:18,090
Were you in the army?

622
00:43:18,450 --> 00:43:20,110
Yeah, after I left school.

623
00:43:21,630 --> 00:43:23,430
Do you have experience of explosives?

624
00:43:24,910 --> 00:43:25,910
Obviously.

625
00:43:26,350 --> 00:43:27,350
It's the job.

626
00:43:27,870 --> 00:43:30,830
You can't do proper peacekeeping without
guns and bombs and stuff.

627
00:43:32,490 --> 00:43:35,090
Where were you when the bomb went
off, as a matter of interest?

628
00:43:35,550 --> 00:43:38,810
I was here, preserving the
nation's heritage.

629
00:43:39,630 --> 00:43:40,630
Heard the bang.

630
00:43:41,510 --> 00:43:43,010
Do you do any work at the big house?

631
00:43:44,330 --> 00:43:46,590
Yeah, I've got a roofing job on it
at the moment, as it happens.

632
00:43:47,650 --> 00:43:49,430
Can't pick and choose, we
go with the jobs on.

633
00:43:50,410 --> 00:43:51,710
Can I get on with my work now, please?

634
00:43:52,810 --> 00:43:53,810
And I'll get on with mine.

635
00:43:55,000 --> 00:43:58,000
♪

636
00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:11,000
♪

637
00:44:11,250 --> 00:44:12,500
♪

638
00:44:13,500 --> 00:44:16,500
♪

639
00:44:17,500 --> 00:44:20,500
♪

640
00:44:20,699 --> 00:44:22,179
How long have you worked here, Darren?

641
00:44:22,599 --> 00:44:23,659
I don't work here.

642
00:44:24,079 --> 00:44:25,079
I just help out.

643
00:44:25,519 --> 00:44:27,139
Same as I do at Mr Wilson's bookshop.

644
00:44:29,199 --> 00:44:30,559
I'm basically a freelance.

645
00:44:31,480 --> 00:44:32,480
Freelance what?

646
00:44:33,159 --> 00:44:34,159
Don't laugh.

647
00:44:34,319 --> 00:44:35,379
I've no intention of laughing.

648
00:44:36,379 --> 00:44:37,719
I want to be a film director.

649
00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:42,900
Set that aside for the moment.

650
00:44:43,900 --> 00:44:47,219
The other night you were working while you
were helping out as a night porter?

651
00:44:47,739 --> 00:44:48,739
Yes.

652
00:44:49,179 --> 00:44:50,179
Did you see anyone come and go?

653
00:44:51,400 --> 00:44:52,400
Not really.

654
00:44:52,599 --> 00:44:55,279
I came on at midnight, and
everybody was in by then.

655
00:44:55,360 --> 00:44:57,819
So basically, I went to sleep
in the little office there.

656
00:44:58,699 --> 00:45:01,099
There's a bell you can ring if
anybody has an emergency.

657
00:45:04,599 --> 00:45:06,639
But nobody rang any bells last night.

658
00:45:07,239 --> 00:45:08,239
Only Danny.

659
00:45:08,559 --> 00:45:09,559
Danny the chef.

660
00:45:09,920 --> 00:45:12,980
He came in at six to start doing the
breakfast and he rang the bell.

661
00:45:13,420 --> 00:45:14,619
But that was more of a joke.

662
00:45:15,219 --> 00:45:16,440
He's a great joker, our Danny.

663
00:45:18,219 --> 00:45:19,219
Danny here now?

664
00:45:19,539 --> 00:45:20,539
He's in the kitchen.

665
00:45:25,449 --> 00:45:26,869
You talk to him, Troy.

666
00:45:27,750 --> 00:45:30,169
I'm going to meet the weasels
in the Wildwood.

667
00:45:30,489 --> 00:45:31,489
Weasels?

668
00:45:31,829 --> 00:45:34,469
I think it's time we heard the lower
warden side of the story.

669
00:46:06,500 --> 00:46:12,000
♪

670
00:46:26,750 --> 00:46:27,750
What's this?

671
00:46:29,130 --> 00:46:30,869
Are you going to read about
more nights of passion?

672
00:46:33,500 --> 00:46:34,739
You must be Danny.

673
00:46:35,219 --> 00:46:36,219
That's me.

674
00:46:38,760 --> 00:46:40,460
Sergeant Troy, Causton CID.

675
00:46:41,860 --> 00:46:43,500
Do you know Chief Inspector Barnaby?

676
00:46:44,340 --> 00:46:45,340
Yeah, he's my boss.

677
00:46:45,960 --> 00:46:46,960
I've got something for him.

678
00:46:52,200 --> 00:46:53,200
You've finished here.

679
00:46:54,820 --> 00:46:56,320
Have you a statement for the press?

680
00:46:57,220 --> 00:46:58,220
Yeah.

681
00:46:58,320 --> 00:46:59,320
Push off.

682
00:47:11,050 --> 00:47:12,050
That's for Mrs. Barnaby.

683
00:47:13,170 --> 00:47:14,170
I'm sorry?

684
00:47:14,410 --> 00:47:16,610
She was here for the opening ceremony
dressed as a milkmaid?

685
00:47:17,430 --> 00:47:18,430
I believe so.

686
00:47:18,450 --> 00:47:20,769
And she was admiring my meatballs, and
I promised to give her the recipe.

687
00:47:22,630 --> 00:47:23,630
Thank you, Danny.

688
00:47:24,470 --> 00:47:25,470
I'll pass it on.

689
00:47:39,500 --> 00:47:44,500
♪

690
00:47:44,750 --> 00:47:49,750
♪

691
00:47:59,099 --> 00:48:02,079
Well, the police are not
my favorite people.

692
00:48:03,039 --> 00:48:05,860
If the Smythe-Websters are
shoveling dirt all over

693
00:48:05,860 --> 00:48:08,059
us, I'll do what I can to
put the record straight.

694
00:48:09,199 --> 00:48:13,920
I hear tell that Ellis Bell
was a Lower Warden man,

695
00:48:14,679 --> 00:48:18,480
and that you people from
Lower Warden are very

696
00:48:18,480 --> 00:48:22,619
aggrieved at the way the Smythe-Websters
have appropriated him.

697
00:48:28,000 --> 00:48:32,440
Alice Bell, born out of wedlock here

698
00:48:33,460 --> 00:48:35,820
in Lower Warden in 1867.

699
00:48:36,820 --> 00:48:42,559
Died in poverty in Causton in 1930,
the year of the Great Slump.

700
00:48:43,059 --> 00:48:44,059
Out of wedlock?

701
00:48:44,420 --> 00:48:47,699
His mother worked at the big
house in Upper Warden.

702
00:48:48,880 --> 00:48:51,039
And she was seduced by
the son of the house.

703
00:48:52,219 --> 00:48:56,260
The Smythe-Websters denied
paternity, but later

704
00:48:56,260 --> 00:48:58,340
they helped young Alice Bell
to get work as a teacher.

705
00:48:59,139 --> 00:49:01,300
So I think that's a guilty
plea, don't you?

706
00:49:01,659 --> 00:49:03,800
Anyway, it's all in the book, $9.99.

707
00:49:05,360 --> 00:49:06,360
Oh, yes, thank you.

708
00:49:07,599 --> 00:49:11,159
It, uh, looks very different
from the book of the film.

709
00:49:11,460 --> 00:49:15,260
Well, that's because the original is
an old-fashioned socialist novel.

710
00:49:17,449 --> 00:49:20,469
He calls it the house of Satan,
because he saw the

711
00:49:20,469 --> 00:49:23,409
Smythe-Websters as totally corrupt
from top to bottom.

712
00:49:24,829 --> 00:49:29,009
They took our book and turned it
into a cut price horror movie.

713
00:49:30,269 --> 00:49:32,210
So you're not one of the
world's greatest

714
00:49:32,210 --> 00:49:33,909
admirers of the Smythe-Websters,
are you?

715
00:49:35,269 --> 00:49:38,649
Everything we have of
value, they steal.

716
00:49:40,710 --> 00:49:44,049
Medial in truth, medial in power.

717
00:49:48,099 --> 00:49:50,719
Whose idea was it to make the movie?

718
00:49:51,539 --> 00:49:54,819
Asked Jack Wilson, the
bard of Upper Warden.

719
00:49:55,139 --> 00:49:57,099
Oh, the editor of the
church newsletter.

720
00:49:57,579 --> 00:49:59,159
And a failed writer.

721
00:50:00,460 --> 00:50:03,400
The most dangerous animal in the
jungle, a failed writer.

722
00:50:05,279 --> 00:50:07,940
If you hate these people so much.

723
00:50:09,849 --> 00:50:12,009
Would I consider murdering them?

724
00:50:12,469 --> 00:50:13,469
No.

725
00:50:14,009 --> 00:50:16,029
I'm a card-carrying peacenik.

726
00:50:17,170 --> 00:50:18,429
Check with MI5.

727
00:50:18,529 --> 00:50:20,230
Ask them about Sarah Proudy.

728
00:50:20,509 --> 00:50:21,509
They'll tell you.

729
00:50:21,949 --> 00:50:23,289
Let me give you a bag for that.

730
00:50:30,949 --> 00:50:33,449
Is the spray can mightier
than the sword?

731
00:50:35,029 --> 00:50:36,629
Well, it doesn't kill people.

732
00:50:37,609 --> 00:50:39,829
And you're familiar with
the Book of Leviticus?

733
00:50:41,469 --> 00:50:44,929
I didn't reject the Bible without
reading it first.

734
00:50:45,829 --> 00:50:47,569
What sort of woman do you think I am?

735
00:51:00,050 --> 00:51:01,510
Have you always been a chef?

736
00:51:02,470 --> 00:51:03,690
It's the only job I've ever done.

737
00:51:05,070 --> 00:51:06,470
And you came here straight
from school?

738
00:51:08,949 --> 00:51:10,349
No, not exactly.

739
00:51:12,699 --> 00:51:14,739
We're very good at guilty
secrets, Danny.

740
00:51:16,219 --> 00:51:17,219
That's not a secret.

741
00:51:18,159 --> 00:51:19,319
It was in the local papers.

742
00:51:23,000 --> 00:51:24,739
I learned to cook when
I was in Borstal.

743
00:51:25,900 --> 00:51:27,539
Ah, the cricket pavilion.

744
00:51:28,159 --> 00:51:29,159
Oh, you heard about that, did you?

745
00:51:30,579 --> 00:51:31,579
I didn't do it, of course.

746
00:51:32,599 --> 00:51:33,599
I suppose they all say that.

747
00:51:34,500 --> 00:51:36,079
Yeah, they do all say that.

748
00:51:36,639 --> 00:51:38,400
When I came out, Mr. Rupert
gave me a job here.

749
00:51:39,280 --> 00:51:40,539
Hey, rehabilitation works.

750
00:51:40,639 --> 00:51:41,639
I am the living proof.

751
00:51:42,980 --> 00:51:44,559
He even set me on a management
course last year.

752
00:51:45,400 --> 00:51:47,199
I could end up running the old
caboodle for the family.

753
00:51:48,159 --> 00:51:50,179
Chief executive, how they love.

754
00:51:51,199 --> 00:51:52,480
And there's no reason why you should

755
00:51:52,480 --> 00:51:54,940
want to murder Larry Smith
or Frank Webster.

756
00:51:57,340 --> 00:51:58,620
Smythe-Webster's might be a bunch of

757
00:51:58,620 --> 00:52:01,260
chinless tossers, but they've
been very good to me.

758
00:52:07,050 --> 00:52:08,250
See yourself, Dan.

759
00:52:21,800 --> 00:52:22,960
Lovely things, don't you reckon?

760
00:52:24,500 --> 00:52:25,500
Aren't they yours?

761
00:52:25,599 --> 00:52:26,599
Yeah.

762
00:52:27,160 --> 00:52:28,760
Sort of extended loan from Mr. Rupert.

763
00:52:29,840 --> 00:52:30,900
Must be worth a bit.

764
00:52:32,139 --> 00:52:33,720
Around 50 grand each, I believe.

765
00:52:35,460 --> 00:52:37,460
And what did you do to deserve this?

766
00:52:38,220 --> 00:52:39,340
He never had kids of his own.

767
00:52:39,840 --> 00:52:41,940
So I'm a sort of mate, see?

768
00:52:42,539 --> 00:52:43,539
Make him laugh.

769
00:52:44,559 --> 00:52:45,559
Go on, ask around.

770
00:52:45,820 --> 00:52:46,820
Everybody likes Danny.

771
00:52:55,960 --> 00:52:57,679
-Lunch.
-Oh, thank you.

772
00:52:58,579 --> 00:52:59,579
Any joy at the manor?

773
00:53:00,539 --> 00:53:02,400
Both Danny and Darren
were in the right

774
00:53:02,400 --> 00:53:04,659
places at the right times
for both murders.

775
00:53:05,400 --> 00:53:06,400
Motives?

776
00:53:06,780 --> 00:53:09,059
Darren's an obsessive nerd
with a grudge against

777
00:53:09,059 --> 00:53:10,940
Frank Webster for not giving
him a job on the

778
00:53:10,940 --> 00:53:14,219
movie, but I can't see him
as a cold-blooded killer.

779
00:53:14,940 --> 00:53:16,119
What about the video he gave you?

780
00:53:16,900 --> 00:53:17,980
It was the shining.

781
00:53:20,039 --> 00:53:21,039
He apologized.

782
00:53:21,179 --> 00:53:23,900
He got his labels mixed up, but he's
bringing the right one in later.

783
00:53:24,539 --> 00:53:25,699
No, that Danny, the chef.

784
00:53:26,380 --> 00:53:30,039
Oh, he asked me to give this
recipe to Mrs. Barnaby.

785
00:53:32,420 --> 00:53:36,400
They were getting on like a house on fire,
apparently, till the bomb went off.

786
00:53:36,659 --> 00:53:40,059
Oh, were they? Thank you. God,
these are bloody disgusting.

787
00:53:41,019 --> 00:53:42,579
Best I could get, sir, from the Pope.

788
00:53:44,699 --> 00:53:45,879
Tell me about Danny.

789
00:53:46,859 --> 00:53:47,960
Well, he seems very popular.

790
00:53:48,919 --> 00:53:49,919
Everybody likes him.

791
00:53:50,500 --> 00:53:54,299
He said to himself, and he's well in
with the family, especially Rupert.

792
00:53:54,419 --> 00:53:55,419
Is he now?

793
00:53:58,199 --> 00:54:02,519
And when two of the natural heirs
to the estate are murdered, it

794
00:54:02,519 --> 00:54:04,839
doesn't occur to you you might be
getting a little, um, impatient?

795
00:54:05,519 --> 00:54:08,659
Or possibly carrying out the
wishes of his master.

796
00:54:11,119 --> 00:54:12,960
How'd you get on with
the, uh, weasels?

797
00:54:14,139 --> 00:54:18,079
I know now who put your Russian
goalie on our door.

798
00:54:18,819 --> 00:54:19,819
Oh, yeah?

799
00:54:20,000 --> 00:54:21,000
Who's that?

800
00:54:21,219 --> 00:54:24,199
Sarah Proudy, curator of
the Ellis Bell Museum.

801
00:54:24,519 --> 00:54:26,079
Either because she knows
something about the

802
00:54:26,079 --> 00:54:30,139
Smythe-Webster family we
do not, or because she

803
00:54:30,139 --> 00:54:32,559
wants to divert our attention
away from Loa Wharton.

804
00:54:33,039 --> 00:54:36,379
She also told me that the
person most resentful

805
00:54:36,379 --> 00:54:40,279
about the film was the bookshop
owner, Jack Wilson.

806
00:54:46,099 --> 00:54:47,099
Hello?

807
00:54:51,800 --> 00:54:52,800
Hello?

808
00:54:54,539 --> 00:54:55,560
Afternoon, Mr. Wilson.

809
00:55:01,300 --> 00:55:02,519
Forgive the mess.

810
00:55:02,860 --> 00:55:04,280
I wasn't expecting company.

811
00:55:05,180 --> 00:55:08,400
This is just a routine confirm
or deny question.

812
00:55:09,280 --> 00:55:13,820
Is it true that it was your idea to make
a film based on Ellis Bell's book?

813
00:55:14,900 --> 00:55:15,900
It's no secret.

814
00:55:17,640 --> 00:55:18,700
Tell us what happened.

815
00:55:20,420 --> 00:55:23,539
Well, I bought a copy of the book when Sarah
Prouty brought out that reprint.

816
00:55:24,440 --> 00:55:26,400
I took it to Mr. Smythe-Webster,

817
00:55:26,560 --> 00:55:28,740
suggesting that he might
make a successful film.

818
00:55:29,160 --> 00:55:30,900
Why didn't he show it to
his brother, Frank?

819
00:55:31,840 --> 00:55:35,220
I admit, Mr. Webster,
he liked the title.

820
00:55:37,360 --> 00:55:38,360
And?

821
00:55:51,400 --> 00:55:53,679
He encouraged me to write this.

822
00:55:55,059 --> 00:55:57,880
The House of Satan, screenplay
by Jack Wilson.

823
00:55:59,219 --> 00:56:01,699
A year later, the film unit arrived.

824
00:56:02,400 --> 00:56:06,019
They used a screenplay written by some
chap he'd been at school with.

825
00:56:06,860 --> 00:56:09,119
And as you probably know, they
turned it into a horror film.

826
00:56:10,840 --> 00:56:11,980
Did they pay you anything?

827
00:56:12,539 --> 00:56:13,539
Not a penny.

828
00:56:14,219 --> 00:56:15,840
I could have had two days'
work as an extra

829
00:56:15,840 --> 00:56:18,340
playing the part of a corpse,
but I declined.

830
00:56:24,500 --> 00:56:27,300
Is that part of your duplicating
machine, Mr. Wilson?

831
00:56:28,880 --> 00:56:29,880
No.

832
00:56:30,440 --> 00:56:32,719
You find me working in my capacity as

833
00:56:32,719 --> 00:56:36,159
Honorary Armorer of the Upper
Warden Territorial Army.

834
00:56:53,050 --> 00:56:55,590
Do you keep live ammunition
here, Mr. Wilson?

835
00:56:56,310 --> 00:57:00,289
I'm permitted to dispense blank ammunition
for the purposes of field exercises.

836
00:57:01,010 --> 00:57:04,090
But live rounds for use on
the firing range may

837
00:57:04,090 --> 00:57:06,289
only be released on the authority
of the major.

838
00:57:06,890 --> 00:57:08,630
Major Rupert's a smiley
of the whipster.

839
00:57:08,769 --> 00:57:09,769
Yes, sir.

840
00:57:09,870 --> 00:57:12,690
Those are thunder flashes,
just glorified fireworks.

841
00:57:14,750 --> 00:57:15,910
Do you have an inventory?

842
00:57:27,660 --> 00:57:31,980
You've been very keen, Mr. Wilson,
to blame the people

843
00:57:31,980 --> 00:57:35,600
from Lower Warden for these
killings, even though you

844
00:57:35,600 --> 00:57:39,220
yourself had even greater reason
to feel, uh, betrayed.

845
00:57:40,440 --> 00:57:42,360
You refused to work on
the film, you say.

846
00:57:43,240 --> 00:57:45,160
Yet you were there on the day of

847
00:57:45,160 --> 00:57:48,480
Larry's death, dressed as
a village blacksmith.

848
00:57:49,680 --> 00:57:50,960
Life's too short to bear grudges.

849
00:57:51,820 --> 00:57:52,840
There's one of these missing, sir.

850
00:57:55,000 --> 00:57:58,039
There'll be more than enough explosive
in a box to blow up the summer house.

851
00:57:58,719 --> 00:58:00,019
I had nothing to do with that.

852
00:58:01,260 --> 00:58:02,619
How do you account for
the missing box?

853
00:58:03,159 --> 00:58:04,159
I didn't know it was gone.

854
00:58:05,940 --> 00:58:06,940
Who else has a key?

855
00:58:08,639 --> 00:58:09,699
Only the major, sir.

856
00:58:18,400 --> 00:58:19,900
Is this Smiley's Webster?

857
00:58:22,260 --> 00:58:23,260
Good afternoon.

858
00:58:27,450 --> 00:58:29,890
What's this, uh, window shopping
as therapy, is it?

859
00:58:30,910 --> 00:58:34,170
No, I just thought it might
take my mind off things.

860
00:58:35,030 --> 00:58:36,030
Does it?

861
00:58:36,830 --> 00:58:37,830
Not really.

862
00:58:38,990 --> 00:58:39,990
Sorry.

863
00:58:44,099 --> 00:58:46,480
And now that we're well
away from the big

864
00:58:46,480 --> 00:58:49,219
house, I'd like to ask
you a rude question.

865
00:58:50,139 --> 00:58:51,139
Another one?

866
00:58:51,860 --> 00:58:53,960
Did you have an affair with
your husband's brother?

867
00:58:56,930 --> 00:58:57,930
Which one?

868
00:58:58,430 --> 00:58:59,490
Simon or Frank?

869
00:59:01,450 --> 00:59:02,810
Well, either.

870
00:59:03,830 --> 00:59:04,870
No, neither.

871
00:59:07,130 --> 00:59:10,570
Simon's a vicar, and Frank
had sweaty feet.

872
00:59:12,470 --> 00:59:13,910
I like that, don't you?

873
00:59:16,750 --> 00:59:18,650
Would you call that beige?

874
00:59:19,449 --> 00:59:20,449
Sir?

875
00:59:22,849 --> 00:59:25,589
You need another word with your
sergeant, Mr. Barnaby.

876
00:59:26,769 --> 00:59:27,769
So I do.

877
00:59:28,150 --> 00:59:29,150
Excuse me.

878
00:59:33,360 --> 00:59:35,480
I got the list of telephone
numbers that the late

879
00:59:35,480 --> 00:59:39,340
Frank Webster called from his
mobile, mostly to his

880
00:59:39,340 --> 00:59:42,460
office in London and also
a film company in Los

881
00:59:42,460 --> 00:59:47,480
Angeles, but also to Sarah Proudy and
Phil Harrison in Lower Warden.

882
00:59:47,780 --> 00:59:49,500
Phil Harrison, who lives
in the windmill, yeah?

883
00:59:49,640 --> 00:59:50,640
That's right.

884
00:59:50,640 --> 00:59:52,039
Well, I trust you are
leaping into action.

885
00:59:52,400 --> 00:59:54,760
I'm meeting Phil for a drink
this evening in the chapel.

886
00:59:54,800 --> 00:59:55,800
That's excellent.

887
00:59:55,800 --> 00:59:58,820
You keep him occupied in the pub, whilst
I check up on the windmill.

888
01:00:13,000 --> 01:00:18,000
♪

889
01:00:18,250 --> 01:00:19,500
♪

890
01:00:31,500 --> 01:00:36,500
♪

891
01:00:36,750 --> 01:00:41,750
♪

892
01:00:42,000 --> 01:00:43,500
♪

893
01:00:51,450 --> 01:00:53,190
Too little too late.

894
01:00:54,650 --> 01:00:58,510
And besides, you're dealing
with the wrong person.

895
01:01:01,519 --> 01:01:03,119
Sorry, am I interrupting?

896
01:01:04,460 --> 01:01:05,639
I'm looking for the chapel.

897
01:01:06,900 --> 01:01:08,960
Smart money says it's
the building across

898
01:01:08,960 --> 01:01:11,019
the street that looks very
much like a chapel.

899
01:01:11,239 --> 01:01:13,559
It hasn't been a chapel
for 50 years or more.

900
01:01:14,559 --> 01:01:17,099
We've never had much time
for God in Lower Warden.

901
01:01:18,579 --> 01:01:20,380
He doesn't seem to be on our side.

902
01:01:22,900 --> 01:01:23,900
Thank you.

903
01:01:27,900 --> 01:01:31,980
It was a nice try, Rupert,
but you're much too late.

904
01:01:33,000 --> 01:01:34,820
1,000 years too late?

905
01:01:36,019 --> 01:01:38,260
Oh, you see, you do understand.

906
01:02:00,070 --> 01:02:01,070
Fancy a game?

907
01:02:01,789 --> 01:02:03,610
I'm supposed to be playing a mate,
but he isn't here yet.

908
01:02:06,539 --> 01:02:07,539
I'm here on business.

909
01:02:08,579 --> 01:02:11,559
You can have a game of pool and do your
cross-examination at the same time.

910
01:02:13,000 --> 01:02:14,599
Blue's a vice of drinks, hasn't it?

911
01:02:29,500 --> 01:02:34,000
♪

912
01:02:35,000 --> 01:02:41,000
♪

913
01:02:42,500 --> 01:02:48,500
♪

914
01:02:49,000 --> 01:02:54,000
♪

915
01:02:54,250 --> 01:02:55,500
♪

916
01:03:01,000 --> 01:03:06,000
♪

917
01:03:06,250 --> 01:03:07,500
♪

918
01:03:08,399 --> 01:03:08,998
Bastard!

919
01:03:09,000 --> 01:03:14,000
♪

920
01:03:14,250 --> 01:03:19,250
♪

921
01:03:25,869 --> 01:03:28,710
Frank Webster made a series of
phone calls to you this week.

922
01:03:29,309 --> 01:03:30,309
What were they about?

923
01:03:31,250 --> 01:03:32,250
The windmill.

924
01:03:32,789 --> 01:03:33,789
The windmill?

925
01:03:35,349 --> 01:03:38,530
Yeah, he wanted a windmill for
the house of Satan, too.

926
01:03:39,510 --> 01:03:42,250
So the villain could die
a horrible death.

927
01:03:44,409 --> 01:03:48,429
Still, I don't suppose we want him that
now, the way things have turned out.

928
01:03:49,510 --> 01:03:50,590
Stranger in town breaks.

929
01:03:50,670 --> 01:03:51,670
OK.

930
01:04:04,679 --> 01:04:07,199
-Whoa!
-We have a hustler in our midst.

931
01:04:08,019 --> 01:04:09,239
Minnesota Troy.

932
01:04:12,750 --> 01:04:13,969
Are you his mate?

933
01:04:15,070 --> 01:04:16,070
Yeah, sure, why not?

934
01:04:17,110 --> 01:04:18,230
We go back a long way.

935
01:04:19,769 --> 01:04:21,969
You've got your feet well under
the table at the manor.

936
01:04:22,510 --> 01:04:23,530
Chief Executive and waiting.

937
01:04:24,809 --> 01:04:26,269
Are you still welcome in Lower Warden?

938
01:04:27,030 --> 01:04:29,190
Oh, that's what the old
farts tell you.

939
01:04:29,849 --> 01:04:32,230
No, we haven't burnt down a castle
round here for what?

940
01:04:33,170 --> 01:04:34,170
500 years?

941
01:04:35,349 --> 01:04:36,349
Well, a castle, maybe.

942
01:04:36,610 --> 01:04:37,789
But what about a cricket pavilion?

943
01:04:51,870 --> 01:04:53,850
Thank you, Sergeant, that's
very decent of you.

944
01:04:58,699 --> 01:05:00,099
Having a bad night?

945
01:05:00,980 --> 01:05:02,259
It was not really my game.

946
01:05:02,679 --> 01:05:03,679
We noticed.

947
01:05:03,719 --> 01:05:04,919
Ah, that's the secret.

948
01:05:05,039 --> 01:05:07,679
We all have to find our natural game.

949
01:05:07,799 --> 01:05:08,799
Night night's a passion.

950
01:05:11,699 --> 01:05:12,840
What's your natural game?

951
01:05:13,320 --> 01:05:14,320
Winning the class war?

952
01:05:15,300 --> 01:05:17,179
Must have been 1960s.

953
01:05:18,099 --> 01:05:20,500
But I suppose that was
before your time.

954
01:05:35,500 --> 01:05:39,500
♪

955
01:05:40,500 --> 01:05:43,500
♪

956
01:05:45,000 --> 01:05:49,000
♪

957
01:05:52,000 --> 01:05:57,000
♪

958
01:05:57,250 --> 01:06:02,250
♪

959
01:06:09,930 --> 01:06:10,930
Mr. Barnaby!

960
01:06:15,949 --> 01:06:16,989
What do you want?

961
01:06:17,269 --> 01:06:19,969
I can't talk about it out here
on account that it's private.

962
01:06:20,369 --> 01:06:21,889
And it might lead to an early arrest.

963
01:06:22,169 --> 01:06:23,169
Oh.

964
01:06:23,869 --> 01:06:24,869
Yeah, make it quick.

965
01:06:24,969 --> 01:06:25,969
Sergeant Troy will see to you.

966
01:06:25,989 --> 01:06:26,989
Come on.

967
01:06:35,300 --> 01:06:39,280
You'll need your notebook
and your tape recorder.

968
01:06:40,940 --> 01:06:41,940
Tape recorder?

969
01:06:42,580 --> 01:06:43,720
This has to be on the record.

970
01:06:45,820 --> 01:06:46,820
What has?

971
01:06:48,550 --> 01:06:49,570
Isn't it obvious?

972
01:06:50,389 --> 01:06:51,450
I've come to confess.

973
01:07:01,400 --> 01:07:03,460
There have been two murders, Darren.

974
01:07:04,900 --> 01:07:06,400
Which one are you holding
your hand up to?

975
01:07:07,880 --> 01:07:08,920
Or did you do both?

976
01:07:15,000 --> 01:07:16,679
I let your tyres down.

977
01:07:18,280 --> 01:07:19,460
It's an old tradition.

978
01:07:21,139 --> 01:07:23,099
Once a month, someone
from Upper Warden

979
01:07:23,099 --> 01:07:25,300
goes to Lower Warden and
does something bad.

980
01:07:25,980 --> 01:07:28,719
This month it was my turn,
so I let your tyres down.

981
01:07:29,320 --> 01:07:31,199
But I thought it was
a Lower Warden car.

982
01:07:31,340 --> 01:07:32,639
I didn't realise it was yours.

983
01:07:37,800 --> 01:07:40,260
Well, Darren, I think this
is a case where we can

984
01:07:41,400 --> 01:07:44,960
exercise our discretion and let
you go with the caution.

985
01:07:45,619 --> 01:07:47,139
Don't you want to hear
the other stuff?

986
01:07:49,360 --> 01:07:50,440
What other stuff?

987
01:07:51,240 --> 01:07:54,780
Like what I saw in Lower Warden
after I let your tires down.

988
01:07:55,840 --> 01:07:56,840
What did you see?

989
01:07:58,980 --> 01:08:00,780
I was lurking across the street.

990
01:08:01,160 --> 01:08:04,440
I mean, I don't see it as lurking,
but some people do.

991
01:08:04,780 --> 01:08:06,780
And I saw Danny and Phil
come out of the chapel.

992
01:08:06,780 --> 01:08:08,860
And they were having a right sex talk.

993
01:08:12,289 --> 01:08:13,309
So where was the money, Phil?

994
01:08:13,609 --> 01:08:14,929
He didn't give me any money.

995
01:08:26,279 --> 01:08:27,880
Were they arguing about money?

996
01:08:28,639 --> 01:08:29,779
Definitely about money.

997
01:08:31,099 --> 01:08:34,939
Have you collected any other stuff
in the course of your lurking?

998
01:08:36,279 --> 01:08:37,659
I brought my videos.

999
01:08:39,199 --> 01:08:40,979
I make fly on the wall documentaries.

1000
01:08:41,380 --> 01:08:43,319
It's like lurking with a camera.

1001
01:08:45,039 --> 01:08:48,779
And here, that's the one you've
been waiting for.

1002
01:08:49,119 --> 01:08:51,460
The opening ceremony of the
satanic experience.

1003
01:08:52,079 --> 01:08:53,619
The explosion looks really
good on that one.

1004
01:08:54,500 --> 01:08:56,639
What do you do with these
after you've made them?

1005
01:08:57,500 --> 01:08:59,920
Well, I put them on my website and
hope I'll be talent spotted.

1006
01:09:01,099 --> 01:09:03,960
The trouble is, I don't know
what's on all of them.

1007
01:09:04,579 --> 01:09:07,760
So your best plan might
be to suck it and see.

1008
01:09:18,199 --> 01:09:20,880
This is when they made the
house of Satan last year.

1009
01:09:21,000 --> 01:09:24,399
♪

1010
01:09:24,399 --> 01:09:26,819
On the first day of shooting,
they held a bit

1011
01:09:26,819 --> 01:09:29,079
of a party so the locals
could meet Larry Smith.

1012
01:09:30,000 --> 01:09:35,850
♪

1013
01:09:35,850 --> 01:09:37,310
Is that Sarah Proudy?

1014
01:09:37,750 --> 01:09:38,910
Yeah, Mrs. Proudy was there.

1015
01:09:39,270 --> 01:09:40,270
Mrs. Proudy?

1016
01:09:40,370 --> 01:09:41,370
Is she married?

1017
01:09:41,810 --> 01:09:42,810
I think she was.

1018
01:09:43,770 --> 01:09:44,770
Called herself Ms.

1019
01:09:44,990 --> 01:09:46,150
ever since she got liberated.

1020
01:09:48,390 --> 01:09:49,410
Are they having a row?

1021
01:09:51,070 --> 01:09:52,070
They might have been.

1022
01:09:54,699 --> 01:09:55,820
There's not much more, it is.

1023
01:10:01,950 --> 01:10:03,489
Sorry, it's an old tape.

1024
01:10:04,029 --> 01:10:06,170
We shot this bit before the
microphone went kaput.

1025
01:10:08,699 --> 01:10:10,000
Is that Phil Harrison?

1026
01:10:10,639 --> 01:10:11,639
Yeah.

1027
01:10:11,840 --> 01:10:12,840
He's brilliant.

1028
01:10:13,840 --> 01:10:15,619
He generally wins when
he's on the field.

1029
01:10:16,279 --> 01:10:18,420
Danny's brilliant as well, but
he's better on the flat.

1030
01:10:19,460 --> 01:10:20,639
They've got identical bikes.

1031
01:10:22,699 --> 01:10:23,699
Well, they would.

1032
01:10:23,859 --> 01:10:24,859
They've always been mates.

1033
01:10:26,739 --> 01:10:30,300
Darren, you are a prince amongst men.

1034
01:10:31,000 --> 01:10:36,000
♪

1035
01:10:36,250 --> 01:10:41,250
♪

1036
01:10:41,500 --> 01:10:43,000
♪

1037
01:10:44,800 --> 01:10:46,159
What are we looking for, sir?

1038
01:10:46,880 --> 01:10:49,220
The row that Darren witnessed
outside the chapel

1039
01:10:49,220 --> 01:10:52,020
last night after you'd left
wasn't just about money.

1040
01:10:52,699 --> 01:10:54,699
I think it was villains falling out.

1041
01:10:55,539 --> 01:10:57,640
I saw Danny come here last night
to collect something.

1042
01:10:58,300 --> 01:10:59,300
Must have been money.

1043
01:10:59,760 --> 01:11:01,380
Must have been from the
Smythe-Websters.

1044
01:11:01,960 --> 01:11:05,420
We didn't find it, so something
obviously went wrong.

1045
01:11:05,980 --> 01:11:06,980
Are we talking blackmail?

1046
01:11:07,300 --> 01:11:08,739
Blackmail, money with menaces.

1047
01:11:09,460 --> 01:11:11,480
Pay up or we carry on murdering
your family.

1048
01:11:12,480 --> 01:11:15,020
Danny's expecting his share
of the money, and

1049
01:11:15,020 --> 01:11:19,480
instead he finds, he finds this.

1050
01:11:28,500 --> 01:11:33,500
♪

1051
01:11:33,750 --> 01:11:35,000
♪

1052
01:11:37,949 --> 01:11:39,610
These murders, Danny.

1053
01:11:41,789 --> 01:11:42,789
Yes, sir.

1054
01:11:44,010 --> 01:11:45,970
We can't go on like this, can we?

1055
01:11:47,729 --> 01:11:49,769
Well, we're going to run out
of family, aren't we, sir?

1056
01:11:50,829 --> 01:11:53,289
You've got such a sweet way
of putting things, Danny.

1057
01:11:54,689 --> 01:11:57,649
Have you found out anything
in Lower Wharton?

1058
01:11:58,269 --> 01:11:59,569
I made a bit of progress.

1059
01:12:00,189 --> 01:12:01,949
You might say my inquiries
are ongoing.

1060
01:12:01,949 --> 01:12:02,949
Hmm.

1061
01:12:04,510 --> 01:12:07,889
I tried opening negotiations
with Sarah Proudy,

1062
01:12:08,090 --> 01:12:12,149
but she indicated I was talking
to the wrong person.

1063
01:12:12,369 --> 01:12:13,369
Ms.

1064
01:12:13,630 --> 01:12:16,609
Proudy knows most of what goes
on in Lower Wharton, sir, but

1065
01:12:17,350 --> 01:12:20,090
I don't think she approves of it
all, if you see what I mean.

1066
01:12:22,170 --> 01:12:23,909
The whole thing's so ghastly.

1067
01:12:25,489 --> 01:12:27,309
I'm sure it's affecting my nails.

1068
01:12:44,500 --> 01:12:48,000
♪

1069
01:12:51,250 --> 01:12:52,489
I'll join you later.

1070
01:12:57,000 --> 01:13:02,000
♪

1071
01:13:02,250 --> 01:13:06,500
♪

1072
01:13:07,899 --> 01:13:11,460
Mrs. Smythe-Webster, good morning.

1073
01:13:13,279 --> 01:13:16,000
I can't remember when I last
experienced a good morning.

1074
01:13:23,050 --> 01:13:25,750
You were trying to scrub the graffiti
off the wall, weren't you?

1075
01:13:26,789 --> 01:13:27,789
Yes.

1076
01:13:29,010 --> 01:13:31,010
You seem to think that it was
a reference to Wendy.

1077
01:13:32,230 --> 01:13:33,590
She was very upset about that.

1078
01:13:34,650 --> 01:13:35,810
She's actually very sensitive.

1079
01:13:36,750 --> 01:13:38,050
Stupid, but sensitive.

1080
01:13:39,050 --> 01:13:40,989
But if it wasn't a reference
to her, then?

1081
01:13:47,949 --> 01:13:49,409
It was me, Inspector.

1082
01:13:51,989 --> 01:13:54,529
Mine was the nakedness
that was uncovered.

1083
01:13:56,649 --> 01:13:57,649
I see.

1084
01:14:00,750 --> 01:14:01,750
I have to ask,

1085
01:14:03,810 --> 01:14:04,810
which brother?

1086
01:14:06,529 --> 01:14:07,529
Goodness me.

1087
01:14:08,590 --> 01:14:09,590
Frank, of course.

1088
01:14:14,100 --> 01:14:15,539
Frank was funny.

1089
01:14:15,620 --> 01:14:16,620
He made me laugh.

1090
01:14:18,700 --> 01:14:20,020
I don't laugh very easily.

1091
01:14:23,050 --> 01:14:24,449
Was this recently?

1092
01:14:27,660 --> 01:14:28,840
over 20 years ago.

1093
01:14:31,819 --> 01:14:34,399
You're telling me that Lawrence was...

1094
01:14:35,460 --> 01:14:36,460
was...

1095
01:14:36,880 --> 01:14:37,880
Yes.

1096
01:14:40,740 --> 01:14:42,579
Lawrence was Frank's son.

1097
01:14:46,100 --> 01:14:47,860
Does your husband know about all this?

1098
01:14:48,340 --> 01:14:49,340
Oh, yes.

1099
01:14:52,949 --> 01:14:54,449
How did he feel about it?

1100
01:14:54,449 --> 01:14:55,630
Well, how does he feel about it?

1101
01:14:57,369 --> 01:15:00,309
He hated Frank, hated Lawrence.

1102
01:15:01,789 --> 01:15:05,970
He probably hates me, but
we never talk about it.

1103
01:15:09,449 --> 01:15:13,809
Do you think that your husband killed

1104
01:15:13,809 --> 01:15:16,750
Florence and then killed Frank?

1105
01:15:20,399 --> 01:15:24,119
But I don't think he'd object strenuously
if somebody else did it for him.

1106
01:15:28,229 --> 01:15:30,210
Simon is resolutely Christian.

1107
01:15:31,369 --> 01:15:32,869
Everything is God's will.

1108
01:15:34,250 --> 01:15:36,529
It's a very convenient way of
looking at things, really.

1109
01:15:37,489 --> 01:15:40,529
It means that nothing is
ever anyone's fault.

1110
01:15:41,589 --> 01:15:43,369
That is a wicked distortion.

1111
01:15:50,550 --> 01:15:51,929
Live in the big house, Inspector.

1112
01:15:52,149 --> 01:15:53,149
Laura, please!

1113
01:15:59,989 --> 01:16:02,009
I'm going to pray. You can
join me if you wish.

1114
01:16:17,000 --> 01:16:22,000
♪

1115
01:16:22,250 --> 01:16:27,250
♪

1116
01:16:27,500 --> 01:16:29,000
♪

1117
01:16:40,399 --> 01:16:43,679
You've really made Ellis Bell your
mission in life, haven't you?

1118
01:16:45,299 --> 01:16:47,319
I'm Ellis Bell's great-granddaughter.

1119
01:16:48,899 --> 01:16:50,139
Oh, I see.

1120
01:16:51,879 --> 01:16:55,639
You say, uh, in your preface
to the new edition of The

1121
01:16:55,639 --> 01:16:58,799
House of Satan, that when that
book first appeared in

1122
01:16:59,439 --> 01:17:03,759
1897, the Smythe Websters of the
day bought out the publishers.

1123
01:17:04,439 --> 01:17:06,399
Bought the publishers and
burned the books.

1124
01:17:06,899 --> 01:17:09,759
Set a huge bonfire in the grounds
of the big house.

1125
01:17:10,559 --> 01:17:13,979
And then 100 years later,
they stole it

1126
01:17:13,979 --> 01:17:17,599
back, corrupted it, and
made their millions.

1127
01:17:18,299 --> 01:17:20,679
They took a classic and
crapped all over it.

1128
01:17:21,500 --> 01:17:23,279
Is that what you said
to Mr. Rupert Smythe

1129
01:17:23,279 --> 01:17:24,920
Webster when he came in
to see you last night?

1130
01:17:25,619 --> 01:17:27,239
Oh, that was a social call.

1131
01:17:28,219 --> 01:17:29,219
Social call?

1132
01:17:29,979 --> 01:17:31,979
Very surprised you're
on speaking terms.

1133
01:17:35,119 --> 01:17:39,239
30 years ago, we had a brief
and dangerous liaison.

1134
01:17:41,159 --> 01:17:42,720
It ended in tears, of course.

1135
01:17:43,399 --> 01:17:44,539
Oh, he's not mine.

1136
01:17:45,559 --> 01:17:48,260
There's a potentially decent
man buried under that 1

1137
01:17:48,260 --> 01:17:51,800
,000 years of history, and I thought
I could dig him out.

1138
01:17:52,659 --> 01:17:53,659
I failed.

1139
01:17:54,739 --> 01:17:56,899
My sergeant says he offered you money.

1140
01:17:57,220 --> 01:17:58,579
Which I refused.

1141
01:17:58,920 --> 01:18:02,960
Why? I approached Frank Webster
at the proper time

1142
01:18:02,960 --> 01:18:06,099
about making a contribution to
the running of my museum.

1143
01:18:07,139 --> 01:18:10,279
He said the book was out of copyright
and told me to get lost.

1144
01:18:11,159 --> 01:18:12,159
End of story.

1145
01:18:13,260 --> 01:18:15,220
I don't grovel to these people.

1146
01:18:16,039 --> 01:18:18,500
Well, I don't grovel to anyone,
as you probably gathered.

1147
01:18:20,039 --> 01:18:22,439
Elsie Pinchaw, Danny's mother?

1148
01:18:23,699 --> 01:18:27,399
She died a couple of weeks
ago, a legendary

1149
01:18:27,779 --> 01:18:31,439
midwife of this parish, and
a formidable gossip.

1150
01:18:32,019 --> 01:18:35,399
She'd have answered all your questions,
whether she knew the answers or not.

1151
01:18:35,739 --> 01:18:36,739
Would she really?

1152
01:18:38,579 --> 01:18:39,819
What do you think of Danny?

1153
01:18:41,699 --> 01:18:43,399
Oh, everybody likes Danny.

1154
01:18:44,479 --> 01:18:46,019
I think that's his problem.

1155
01:18:46,859 --> 01:18:50,479
He wants to be liked,
and that's tricky.

1156
01:18:55,079 --> 01:18:56,699
Oh, is this the famous chapel?

1157
01:18:57,779 --> 01:19:02,060
Well, it was before God retreated
and the People's

1158
01:19:02,060 --> 01:19:04,779
Republic of Lower Warden turned
it into a drinking club.

1159
01:19:05,359 --> 01:19:09,060
We did the conversion work ourselves,
a collective enterprise.

1160
01:19:10,979 --> 01:19:12,279
Phil did the building work.

1161
01:19:13,239 --> 01:19:14,479
Danny did the rewiring.

1162
01:19:14,760 --> 01:19:15,859
I burned the altar.

1163
01:19:16,600 --> 01:19:17,960
Danny did the electrics, did he?

1164
01:19:17,960 --> 01:19:20,000
-Yes.
-He's a wizard with wires.

1165
01:19:24,779 --> 01:19:25,779
It's alright.

1166
01:19:26,420 --> 01:19:28,759
Can you meet me at the hotel
in 10 minutes please?

1167
01:19:29,000 --> 01:19:30,139
We need to talk to Danny.

1168
01:19:42,610 --> 01:19:44,250
Helen, how are you feeling?

1169
01:19:44,829 --> 01:19:45,949
Heaps better, thanks.

1170
01:19:46,329 --> 01:19:47,329
Is Danny in this morning?

1171
01:19:47,510 --> 01:19:48,510
He's in the kitchen.

1172
01:19:49,670 --> 01:19:51,210
Tell him it's well past coffee time.

1173
01:19:51,489 --> 01:19:52,489
I will.

1174
01:20:21,500 --> 01:20:26,500
♪

1175
01:20:26,750 --> 01:20:31,750
♪

1176
01:20:32,000 --> 01:20:33,500
♪

1177
01:20:34,000 --> 01:20:38,500
♪

1178
01:20:41,010 --> 01:20:44,629
Helen, has Danny had any
visitors this morning?

1179
01:20:45,489 --> 01:20:46,589
Only Mr. Smythe-Webster.

1180
01:20:46,750 --> 01:20:47,750
What time did he leave?

1181
01:20:49,489 --> 01:20:50,849
Well, I didn't see him leave.

1182
01:20:50,989 --> 01:20:52,029
He could have gone out the back door.

1183
01:20:52,710 --> 01:20:53,710
OK, thanks.

1184
01:20:53,929 --> 01:20:54,929
Has something happened to Danny?

1185
01:20:55,769 --> 01:20:57,309
Yeah, something has happened to Danny.

1186
01:20:59,000 --> 01:21:02,000
♪

1187
01:21:07,260 --> 01:21:08,260
Afternoon, Barnaby.

1188
01:21:09,360 --> 01:21:10,360
Progress report.

1189
01:21:10,579 --> 01:21:11,579
Good afternoon.

1190
01:21:12,460 --> 01:21:14,440
One or two further questions, please.

1191
01:21:19,390 --> 01:21:22,369
I'm told that you and Sarah
Prowley from Lower

1192
01:21:22,369 --> 01:21:25,649
Warden will once, if you'll pardon
the expression, an item.

1193
01:21:26,729 --> 01:21:27,729
My god.

1194
01:21:29,029 --> 01:21:30,630
Yeah, I've been dredging, haven't you?

1195
01:21:31,029 --> 01:21:33,630
Well, there seems an awful lot
to dredge in these parts.

1196
01:21:35,590 --> 01:21:38,890
She said you couldn't have
a proper relationship

1197
01:21:38,890 --> 01:21:42,350
across the tracks if one of the
families owns the tracks.

1198
01:21:43,170 --> 01:21:44,310
It's a fair point.

1199
01:21:44,310 --> 01:21:45,310
Well, I suppose so.

1200
01:21:46,250 --> 01:21:48,170
So I'll return to my own kind.

1201
01:21:51,679 --> 01:21:52,679
That's all over now.

1202
01:22:00,020 --> 01:22:01,020
Good health.

1203
01:22:01,460 --> 01:22:02,460
Thank you.

1204
01:22:04,149 --> 01:22:05,170
How do you mean?

1205
01:22:06,409 --> 01:22:07,409
It's all over now.

1206
01:22:09,609 --> 01:22:11,829
Take a look at that photograph
up there on the mantel.

1207
01:22:15,649 --> 01:22:17,710
The Smythe Webster boys were young.

1208
01:22:20,049 --> 01:22:21,049
Notice anything?

1209
01:22:21,529 --> 01:22:22,529
There were four of you.

1210
01:22:22,969 --> 01:22:23,969
Exactly.

1211
01:22:25,289 --> 01:22:27,849
My big brother, St. John, drove his

1212
01:22:27,849 --> 01:22:29,949
Ferrari into a wall when
he was up at Oxford.

1213
01:22:30,909 --> 01:22:32,389
So we all moved up one.

1214
01:22:33,409 --> 01:22:37,729
I got landed with running this place instead
of becoming the local vicar.

1215
01:22:38,329 --> 01:22:39,389
Would you have enjoyed that?

1216
01:22:39,670 --> 01:22:40,670
Oh, it's a doddle.

1217
01:22:41,369 --> 01:22:44,429
The hours are undemanding, and you get
first whack at the Young Wives Club.

1218
01:22:47,070 --> 01:22:49,369
Why? Why did you say,
it's all over now?

1219
01:22:53,500 --> 01:22:56,119
Well, by the time Big
Brother had killed

1220
01:22:56,119 --> 01:23:00,939
himself, I'd had the operation,
the snip.

1221
01:23:01,899 --> 01:23:05,640
Oh, it was Sarah Proudy's
idea, but made sense

1222
01:23:05,640 --> 01:23:08,060
at the time, looking ahead
to the young wives.

1223
01:23:09,279 --> 01:23:11,979
Simon, as you will have observed,
is fundamentally sexless.

1224
01:23:12,100 --> 01:23:15,000
And Frank, Frank was always
very careful after the

1225
01:23:15,000 --> 01:23:17,439
business with Laura, which brought
forth little Larry.

1226
01:23:19,399 --> 01:23:21,600
We're running out of family,
Mr. Barnaby.

1227
01:23:21,600 --> 01:23:25,220
A thousand years, and now it's over.

1228
01:23:26,279 --> 01:23:27,359
How do you plan to cope?

1229
01:23:29,619 --> 01:23:32,039
That's what the satanic experience
is all about.

1230
01:23:33,520 --> 01:23:36,739
Fatten up the place, sell
it to some global

1231
01:23:36,739 --> 01:23:39,479
leisure corporation, and spend
the money on loose living.

1232
01:23:39,779 --> 01:23:41,659
It's the end of the line, and
nobody will give a damn.

1233
01:23:42,420 --> 01:23:43,420
But why?

1234
01:23:43,560 --> 01:23:46,659
Why would anyone want to murder
your nephew and your brother?

1235
01:23:46,739 --> 01:23:48,939
Why? We've got the money,
and they haven't.

1236
01:23:53,600 --> 01:23:56,800
A box of thunder flashes went
missing a few days ago.

1237
01:23:58,020 --> 01:24:02,840
Mr. Wilson says the only other person
to hold a key to the armory is you.

1238
01:24:04,100 --> 01:24:05,380
You think I killed Larry?

1239
01:24:06,360 --> 01:24:08,220
Anyone else have access to your key?

1240
01:24:10,100 --> 01:24:12,340
Well, I did lose it for
a couple of days, but

1241
01:24:12,340 --> 01:24:14,960
then it turned up, so I thought
no more about it.

1242
01:24:16,900 --> 01:24:20,960
I understand that Danny Pinchell has
become quite a favorite of yours.

1243
01:24:21,960 --> 01:24:23,039
He's a good lad.

1244
01:24:24,280 --> 01:24:28,039
Manages to see past the money and talk
to me like another human being.

1245
01:24:29,220 --> 01:24:31,420
You see him as a prospective heir?

1246
01:24:33,949 --> 01:24:37,250
Oh, I don't know what he's been telling
you, but that's ridiculous.

1247
01:24:38,689 --> 01:24:42,829
Well, I've always said that if we sold
up, we'd try to protect his job.

1248
01:24:42,889 --> 01:24:44,189
But that's hardly the same thing.

1249
01:24:45,189 --> 01:24:46,989
Did you argue with him this morning?

1250
01:24:47,970 --> 01:24:49,210
Over the key, perhaps?

1251
01:24:49,909 --> 01:24:52,849
Daddy, you think Danny stole the key?

1252
01:24:52,949 --> 01:24:53,949
No, no, no.

1253
01:24:54,250 --> 01:24:56,029
Always found him an amiable soul.

1254
01:24:56,809 --> 01:24:58,189
He's a dead soul now.

1255
01:25:00,369 --> 01:25:01,849
-Dead?
-What are you talking about?

1256
01:25:02,829 --> 01:25:06,389
Someone killed him around about
the time of your visit.

1257
01:25:12,399 --> 01:25:13,759
Look it, they can't kill Danny.

1258
01:25:15,559 --> 01:25:16,839
Everybody likes Danny.

1259
01:25:19,800 --> 01:25:21,020
Three possibilities.

1260
01:25:22,560 --> 01:25:25,340
There's a bruise indicating he's
been banged on the head.

1261
01:25:25,960 --> 01:25:28,520
More bruises on the neck indicating that
someone tried to strangle him.

1262
01:25:29,800 --> 01:25:33,079
But I've got a feeling he's
actually been drowned.

1263
01:25:34,100 --> 01:25:35,100
Drowned?

1264
01:25:35,539 --> 01:25:36,539
In gazpacho.

1265
01:25:37,779 --> 01:25:38,779
In what?

1266
01:25:39,000 --> 01:25:40,199
It's cold tomato soup.

1267
01:25:40,539 --> 01:25:44,960
I'd say he was held face
down in that by a

1268
01:25:44,960 --> 01:25:47,400
killer whose clothes must
be in a terrible mess.

1269
01:25:47,400 --> 01:25:49,760
This doesn't tie in with the others.

1270
01:25:50,840 --> 01:25:51,920
Danny wasn't a Smythe Webster.

1271
01:25:53,260 --> 01:25:54,520
Not yet, he wasn't.

1272
01:25:56,380 --> 01:25:57,380
Danny the chef.

1273
01:25:57,860 --> 01:25:59,100
What are you going to
do with this one?

1274
01:25:59,720 --> 01:26:01,500
Call it drugs related and
file under pending?

1275
01:26:04,340 --> 01:26:07,420
You've done very well out of these murders,
haven't you, Mr. Murdoch?

1276
01:26:07,719 --> 01:26:08,719
Just doing my job.

1277
01:26:09,359 --> 01:26:12,159
You see the bright lights
beckoning, don't you?

1278
01:26:12,479 --> 01:26:14,619
But I see a motive for murder.

1279
01:26:15,359 --> 01:26:16,359
That's outrageous.

1280
01:26:16,599 --> 01:26:19,319
Well, that being the case,
your best plan

1281
01:26:19,319 --> 01:26:21,799
will be to stay out of
my field of vision.

1282
01:26:24,300 --> 01:26:26,020
Now, if there are no more questions.

1283
01:26:27,880 --> 01:26:30,579
Is it true a local man is helping
with your inquiries?

1284
01:26:30,980 --> 01:26:32,579
Well, if he is, it'll be a first.

1285
01:26:33,119 --> 01:26:34,119
Sir?

1286
01:26:36,899 --> 01:26:38,379
I found this in Danny's pocket.

1287
01:26:39,179 --> 01:26:40,299
Looks like his mum's diary.

1288
01:26:40,599 --> 01:26:41,599
Excellent.

1289
01:26:49,000 --> 01:26:54,000
♪

1290
01:27:02,300 --> 01:27:03,360
What's the bedding?

1291
01:27:03,420 --> 01:27:06,840
Fielded a cross-country run on that
bike this morning to kill Danny.

1292
01:27:08,020 --> 01:27:09,539
Message received and understood, sir.

1293
01:27:10,500 --> 01:27:15,000
♪

1294
01:27:26,750 --> 01:27:27,750
to

1295
01:27:40,550 --> 01:27:44,449
I thought the point of women's
emancipation was

1296
01:27:44,449 --> 01:27:46,510
that you didn't have to do
the men's dirty washing.

1297
01:27:49,000 --> 01:27:50,000
Troy.

1298
01:28:09,000 --> 01:28:14,000
♪

1299
01:28:14,250 --> 01:28:18,000
♪

1300
01:28:27,900 --> 01:28:29,140
Sorry about the flat tires.

1301
01:28:29,699 --> 01:28:30,840
I don't know where I get these ideas.

1302
01:28:31,399 --> 01:28:33,279
My sergeant has something
to say to you.

1303
01:28:34,060 --> 01:28:36,039
Philip Harrison, you're charged
with the murders

1304
01:28:36,039 --> 01:28:38,819
of Danny Pinchell, Larry Smith,
and Frank Webster.

1305
01:28:40,500 --> 01:28:45,500
♪

1306
01:28:50,500 --> 01:28:56,000
♪

1307
01:28:59,890 --> 01:29:00,890
Bye.

1308
01:29:02,930 --> 01:29:04,190
My nephew was a waster.

1309
01:29:04,430 --> 01:29:05,730
My brother was a waster.

1310
01:29:05,909 --> 01:29:07,350
Dear say, I'm a waster, too.

1311
01:29:09,210 --> 01:29:10,390
Everybody liked Danny.

1312
01:29:10,850 --> 01:29:11,949
No, no, no.

1313
01:29:13,130 --> 01:29:14,150
Everybody was wrong.

1314
01:29:16,489 --> 01:29:18,329
Danny, it was the worst of the lot.

1315
01:29:37,270 --> 01:29:38,970
What did you mean, Danny?

1316
01:29:39,070 --> 01:29:40,070
It was the worst of the lot.

1317
01:29:42,649 --> 01:29:43,989
He was the brains.

1318
01:29:46,549 --> 01:29:47,949
I was the guy who pushed the button.

1319
01:29:50,810 --> 01:29:55,350
Danny borrowed your key to the armory
and he planned the explosion.

1320
01:30:15,619 --> 01:30:18,139
Phil triggered the blast
by remote control.

1321
01:30:24,149 --> 01:30:27,069
But Danny was on hand to give the
signal to the mobile phone.

1322
01:30:33,850 --> 01:30:35,470
I don't believe this.

1323
01:30:36,810 --> 01:30:37,810
But why?

1324
01:30:40,230 --> 01:30:43,829
I saw Frank Webster laugh
at you that day.

1325
01:30:45,030 --> 01:30:48,110
Just because some cheapskate ancestor
wrote a lousy book.

1326
01:30:48,190 --> 01:30:50,030
He was our ancestor.

1327
01:30:50,210 --> 01:30:51,210
You know the law.

1328
01:30:51,470 --> 01:30:55,130
There is no copyright on books 70
years after the writer's death.

1329
01:30:55,289 --> 01:30:57,329
Ellis Bell belongs to the world now.

1330
01:30:57,870 --> 01:30:58,870
Public ownership.

1331
01:30:59,370 --> 01:31:01,610
I thought you people believed
in that, darling, huh?

1332
01:31:06,399 --> 01:31:08,079
He should never have laughed at you.

1333
01:31:08,179 --> 01:31:09,179
Simple as that.

1334
01:31:12,680 --> 01:31:16,640
After Larry died, Frank was supposed to come
through with the money, wasn't he?

1335
01:31:17,220 --> 01:31:18,480
But he didn't, is that right?

1336
01:31:20,539 --> 01:31:21,539
Yeah, that's right.

1337
01:31:22,940 --> 01:31:24,880
I wanted to pay up, he didn't.

1338
01:31:25,880 --> 01:31:27,699
We tossed a coin to decide.

1339
01:31:31,199 --> 01:31:32,260
My way.

1340
01:31:33,220 --> 01:31:35,099
Yeah, he fenced himself as a hard man.

1341
01:31:36,779 --> 01:31:37,819
He wasn't.

1342
01:31:38,500 --> 01:31:41,500
♪

1343
01:32:38,250 --> 01:32:42,229
And I assume you were going to
put pressure on Rupert next.

1344
01:32:44,170 --> 01:32:45,369
He was still the man with the money?

1345
01:32:50,490 --> 01:32:52,170
All right, I can understand.

1346
01:32:52,630 --> 01:32:54,350
Phil hating the family.

1347
01:32:56,010 --> 01:32:57,010
Goodbye, Danny.

1348
01:33:02,800 --> 01:33:04,279
I went to see him this morning.

1349
01:33:05,880 --> 01:33:11,659
We had words, and suddenly he said, oh,
you're an idiot, just like your dad.

1350
01:33:11,860 --> 01:33:13,100
I haven't got a dad.

1351
01:33:13,159 --> 01:33:14,180
Everyone's got one somewhere.

1352
01:33:15,500 --> 01:33:16,500
Yours is Lord of the Manor.

1353
01:33:17,520 --> 01:33:18,520
Yeah.

1354
01:33:18,820 --> 01:33:20,940
If you don't believe me, I can
show you my mom's diary.

1355
01:33:21,180 --> 01:33:22,760
Oh, yeah, Rupert's my dad.

1356
01:33:36,600 --> 01:33:38,840
That means I could spoil everything
for you, couldn't I?

1357
01:33:40,700 --> 01:33:42,120
You set me up, didn't you?

1358
01:33:43,180 --> 01:33:45,140
You wanted me to go down
for all this stuff.

1359
01:33:45,500 --> 01:33:46,800
Well, I went down for the
cricket pavilion.

1360
01:33:48,020 --> 01:33:49,840
Then with me out of the way,
you could have a clear run.

1361
01:33:50,360 --> 01:33:51,360
That's what friends are for.

1362
01:34:14,649 --> 01:34:19,269
What precisely am I being told here?

1363
01:34:22,050 --> 01:34:26,689
Downey's mother, Elsie, was the
midwife at Phil's birth.

1364
01:34:28,329 --> 01:34:31,289
And she always told her
mother, if anything

1365
01:34:31,289 --> 01:34:33,449
goes wrong, I need to know
who the father is.

1366
01:34:35,649 --> 01:34:37,170
And so I told her.

1367
01:34:39,399 --> 01:34:42,799
And she wrote all the names
down in her diary.

1368
01:34:45,000 --> 01:34:48,839
This diary, which we found
on Dennis' body.

1369
01:34:51,750 --> 01:34:52,989
Yes, Rupert.

1370
01:34:54,649 --> 01:34:56,890
You are Philip's father.

1371
01:34:57,829 --> 01:34:58,829
Yeah.

1372
01:35:02,149 --> 01:35:04,929
And I'm your son and heir.

1373
01:35:07,149 --> 01:35:09,909
Except that you people would have
found a way of screwing me.

1374
01:35:11,750 --> 01:35:15,009
We couldn't have some lout from Lower Warden
taking over the manor, could we?

1375
01:35:15,429 --> 01:35:17,710
That's why I never told you.

1376
01:35:20,449 --> 01:35:21,989
You did the right thing, Mum.

1377
01:35:25,920 --> 01:35:26,920
Look at us.

1378
01:35:28,739 --> 01:35:29,739
We're a family.

1379
01:35:42,740 --> 01:35:45,320
So long, Daddy.

1380
01:35:53,000 --> 01:35:58,000
♪

1381
01:35:58,250 --> 01:36:03,000
♪

1382
01:36:10,850 --> 01:36:11,989
Back to normal, then.

1383
01:36:13,149 --> 01:36:15,409
Normal's a bit weird around here,
isn't it, Mr. Wilson?

1384
01:36:16,130 --> 01:36:18,849
No, Darren, weird's another place.

1385
01:36:23,500 --> 01:36:26,500
♪

1386
01:36:35,000 --> 01:36:38,500
♪

1387
01:36:43,699 --> 01:36:45,979
Never thought of you as
a gardener, Sarah.

1388
01:36:48,399 --> 01:36:50,639
I'm keeping it nice for my son.

1389
01:36:57,949 --> 01:37:00,909
Is it too late for us to be friends?

1390
01:37:03,600 --> 01:37:05,000
Oh, I think so.

1391
01:37:06,060 --> 01:37:07,060
Don't you?

1392
01:37:10,000 --> 01:37:13,000
♪

1393
01:37:18,500 --> 01:37:22,500
♪

1394
01:37:31,800 --> 01:37:33,020
You were right.

1395
01:37:33,880 --> 01:37:34,920
It's not a bad book.

1396
01:37:35,600 --> 01:37:36,600
It's very good.

1397
01:37:37,460 --> 01:37:42,600
You didn't tell me that the hero's
name is Harrison, Phil Harrison.

1398
01:37:43,300 --> 01:37:44,340
You didn't ask.

1399
01:37:46,199 --> 01:37:47,199
Is your bookmark?

1400
01:37:47,539 --> 01:37:48,539
Probably.

1401
01:37:50,039 --> 01:37:51,039
Oh, no, it's not.

1402
01:37:52,560 --> 01:37:54,260
Danny's meatball recipe.

1403
01:37:56,320 --> 01:37:57,619
He seemed a nice boy.

1404
01:37:58,279 --> 01:37:59,279
Oh, yeah.

1405
01:37:59,940 --> 01:38:01,020
Everybody liked him.

1406
01:38:02,000 --> 01:38:07,000
♪

1407
01:38:07,250 --> 01:38:12,250
♪

1408
01:38:12,500 --> 01:38:17,500
♪

1409
01:38:17,750 --> 01:38:22,750
♪

1410
01:38:23,000 --> 01:38:28,000
♪

1411
01:38:28,250 --> 01:38:33,250
♪

1412
01:38:33,500 --> 01:38:36,500
♪